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You know deniae, feeling like that is part of grief we are already going through as our partners go down this path. We are angry at what is happening to them and to us. In some ways we don't understand why. We pray, we try to bargain, try to understand why, etc. and we feel alone in this journey.
I think that when things finally do come to the final end, we will have gone through most of the stages of grief and be more accepting. But then, what do I know.
One more thing, I also think that when this thing, illness, dementia, starts to happen to the husband's of friends of mine they will be calling me to talk and give them comfort etc. I don't know if I will be able to do that. Does that sound mean or strange? These are people that we all know who start to distance themselves from us when our journey started and we needed help, a listening ear, a hand with shopping, etc.
Replies to "@deniae You know deniae, feeling like that is part of grief we are already going through..."
I am not allowed to talk about cancer or he gets mad and said no talking about it because that is how you die but I USED MYSELF AS AN EXAMPLE . Being I am the person on this board struggling and have therapists for my suicidal thoughts.. If I were to die he would never commit suicide but he can handle being alone and I am more needy and it scares me that I feel so differently but then there is God to contend with and would he forgive
@kartwk I really want to recite a bunch of affirmations about how awesome you are.
About your comment - you are definitely NOT mean or strange. You are exhausted. Mentally and physically. But we soldier on because if we don’t do it who will?
Isn’t it interesting how people crawl out of the woodwork? It is definitely OK to decline or cut them short if you want. I see you here reaching out to help others. My last (of 4) passed in 2023. Everyone uses me as some sort of medical encyclopedia- and yes I frequently refer them to their Drs and internet to look things up themselves.
Where were they when shit was hitting the fan? After the last I shut myself off from everyone for a while. For me that was a good thing. I needed to rest, to not be on hyper alert, to be able to hear my own thoughts. So here I am 2 years later, facing my own door. I am finally back to myself again, and able to reach out and offer comfort to everyone I can. Partly because I have been on the other side. I have turned into the hugging bear, ready to wrap arms around anyone. Also the bear part because I am willing to stand up to any doctor or friends family member who is not doing right by them. Yeah, I still have some unresolved rage, but I’m working on it🤣😂
You will never regret the time you have spent caregiving for your loved ones.
Know that YOU are a blessing.
🫂
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@kartwk
Everyone is angry with me because I state things that are true. Then I am told i am negative, Yet none of them are dealing with a spouse with cancer hey can go and have FUN NORMAL LIFE