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Living in chronic pain
I've been visiting this forum every day for several weeks now, and there seems to be a new trend throughout a lot of the comments. What I've noticed are the comments about our doctors and specialists not seeming to offer us any/enough sympathy or support in dealing with the chronic, never ending pain that a lot of us are experiencing. Sure, we can tell them what we go through on a daily basis EVERY day of every week, but then they see their next patient and move on.
It just seems that no matter what we tell our doctors, spouses, adult children, friends, or even grandkids about what we have to deal with, and how it affects our daily lives, they can never really truly understand what chronic pain does to someone over a period of several years. It just wears you down physically, emotionally, and mentally, to the point that you're just existing, either for them, or for some other reason.
Some nights, when I'm climbing into my sleeping chair with my wife of 43 years sleeping in her bed on the other side of the room, I don't want to go to sleep because it means starting another day all over again when I wake up. Every day is the same, I wake up alone because my wife is at the office supporting us. She's home when I wake up on Saturday morning, but then she's gone again on Sunday morning at her church for half the day. So I'm at home alone the vast majority of the time. I know she'd do anything to help me whenever it was needed, and she sympathizes with my problems, both mentally and physically, but on some days you just want to stop existing, and for the pain to stop, but getting someone else to understand that seems to be impossible. It's something that can't be conceived of without them actually experiencing it for themselves.
Every day for the past 10+ years I've dealt with the chronic pain of osteoarthritis in my lower back, hips, and knees, as well as idiopathic poly neuropathy in my feet, and I just want it to stop. Another fucking day of just existing and staying at home all day by myself? Why am I even doing this? We never go any where, there's no money for any kind of a vacation. Nothing ever changes, except for the levels of my pain. Every day is exactly the same, and the weeks, months, and years just fly past me. The sheer monotony of my current situation is maddening, and I'm positive that I'm not the only person on this forum who feels exactly the same way.
How can we get someone other than ourselves to comprehend the ways we're feeling having to deal with this? Is it even possible?
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@JustinMcClanahan
I forgot how to send a private message and I have done that to the main poster on chronic pain and living with it really like to get in contact with that person to discuss living like this provide support to each other
Hi, Mr Macbraba, I also struggle with daily really bad chronic pain that took me away from my career at age 52. I have had this pain for 24 years and unfortunately over the years have only added more types of chronic pain to deal with. I don't get out often because of this pain and when I do get out, I am dealing with pain that makes it difficult to enjoy my outing. Thank goodness I have my husband, who still works part-time. He does a lit for me, including grocery shopping using a list I prepare for him.
I find it hard to stay positive but having my family really helps. Having my 2 doggies also helps. So I empathize with your situation. Please try to find some hobbies or activities that help to distract you from your pain. Your life has meaning.
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4 Reactions@loriesco I actually did buy the cherry zazee because you mentioned it. I also picked up ashwagonda. I have noticed some less pain and much more ambition! It took a few weeks, but i am doing more than in the last couple years! I been hearing a lot about magnesium too for neuropathy. We definitely have to look out for ourselves now days!
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1 Reaction@ld800 i did not see the message about cherry zazee, I looked it up but what is it meant to help?
Also I looked up ashwagonda (Ashwagandha) and it seems there could be major issues, go to NIH web page.
@ld800 I am so glad to hear it! Might mean you have gout. Of course when you test your uric acid level it will be better because you are taking the Zazzee! I went on the Allopurinol Medicine and feel my gout is well controlled now. My uric acid level is PERFECTLY at the mean! I might try the magnesium again... I had a leg cramp last night and was thinking about it. Glad you are motivated!
@rrenaut The Zazzee helped identify that I was suffering with chronic gout pains in my joints.
Thank you. I don't think that applies to me, but I can keep that idea in my mind
I understand your feelings. Every morning I say maybe today I won't have pain. But I keep praying and having hope that God will heal me. It's hard to keep the faith. It's hard to have patience and persevere, but without it there is nothing to look forward to. I pray you will find peace and hope.
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4 ReactionsI came on this forum because when I googled pain forums I found your comments. I know it says August but I wish I knew what year. The first few words sounded familiar. Not because I had read them before but because I live it everyday. I was a firefighter. Now I am a disabled firefighter. While still on active duty 2001 I had my first fusion. L4/L5 of course and the diagnosis of degenerative disc disease. 2010 brought me a double bypass and retirement that I wasn't wanting yet. 2011 L3 was fused to the other two. Now 2025 brings arthritis in my spine leg joints and hands. My back is always severe pain. I have a spinal stimulater that does nothing. It does have a tense machine mode that I use to cover some of the pain and hides my restless legs because yes I get to have that too. I've been though the depression and alcoholic stage but I have been sober 15 years. I'm not on any medications because at this point they just want to keep putting shots in my back and several ablation. So having said all the I am at the point that you ask in your comments. Why and for how much longer do I have to suffer this way. What is the point. Why with all the medical knowledge and new technologies cant they stop or pain. So many days I just dont want to get out of bed unfortunately I have a wife like you talk about that just doesn't realize the pain so I get up and keep trying. I think I am back in the depression stage. At least I have zero desire to drink. But I like others on here have to think why can't it end?
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2 Reactions@robert310
Greetings. I can safely and sincerely opine, that people (my husband included) who has not experienced pain and what it truly feels like to live with debilitating pain, do not believe nor understand what we go through. I too, hàve undergone multiple ablations, cortisone epidurals , et al, that didn't really help. Then came the brain aneurysms and associated complications. I may not be at your physical pain level but I do understand and could relate to hoŵ it feels to have to not want to get out of bed and have days when I ask myself, "How long am I going to endure and suffer?" I have stopped asking because I know that nothing in life is stàgnant. Something is bound to change. Please look at what you have achieved, sobriety. And it is okay to be not okay. I still get angry and depressed; but in-between my agony and pain, somehow, I get a surprise of a day with a tolerable level of 4 of 10 pain level. I will keep you in my prayers.
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