@suppiskey2surv this is exactly why I thought this group would be a healthy outlet for me! To find out that my experiences are unexceptional and that others go through the same things that I go through. We have so many similar feelings/experiences. To the point about your husband displaying signs of resentment for you questioning the medical professionals: I applaud you for being his advocate. Times have changed and we should no longer look up to doctors as demigods. I came to the realization throughout my wife's journey that they are human, make mistakes just as much as any of us, and are not smarter than me. They are the subject matter expert in their field but sometimes they might be a little too analytical or cease to step back and look at things from a common sense perspective. My example is actually from my own medical issue and not my wife's. During an annual checkup my cholesterol came back high so they treated it with atorvastatin. OK, makes sense. It IS the go-to drug to treat high cholesterol. However, during follow ups my liver enzyme results we coming back elevated. I tried so hard to draw their attention to the correlation between my liver enzyme results being elevated and when I started the atorvastatin and they responded that while the enzymes are high, they weren't dangerously high and atorvastatin is a good drug for high cholesterol. I couldn't understand why they were pushing atorvastatin on me so hard. Is this the ONLY cholesterol medicine in the world? There are no other options where I could have my cake and eat it too (reduce my cholesterol but not damage my liver)? I pushed and pushed and finally the PA agreed to put me on Ezetimibe and retest after a few months. Sure enough, at the next blood test my cholesterol was good AND my liver numbers were good. So it was possible to find an alternative medication that didn't also cause elevated liver numbers. Had I not been willing to advocate for myself and had just taken a "the doctors are always right approach " I would never have achieved the outcome that I did. So I am a firm believer in questioning the doctors. I have also discovered that doctors also sometimes are only knowledgeable in their area. When we first started seeing cardiologists for my wife's heart failure, the cardiologist looked back at her history and stated that her blood pressures had been consistently high in all of her clinical visits dating back 10 years. He was actually pretty angry that no one had raised it as an issue. But most of her history was with nephrology. So what I learned was that when the kidney team sees a blood pressure of 145/85, they simply record it, don't even blink, and move on to doing the kidney stuff-doesnt raise alarm bells. But if you were to go to the cardiology team with those same numbers they would be freaking out saying, "We need to address this immediately! This will have a bad impact on your heart of not resolved ASAP!" So they're not bad people, it's just that they only know what they know and their knowledge can often be limited to their specialty area but we somehow expect them to know it all when in reality that is an unrealistic expectation. Your comment about the IV hit home with me too. I saved my wife from getting an unnecessary iron infusion before. They had already given her an infusion a week prior at the Dialysis center but for some reason the ambulatory infusion center didn't see it in the computer. I think you are doing all the right things! We relate on so many levels. I am happy that you're moving along at a dull roar right now but I totally get the feeling that some issue is right around the corner and even during the quiet times you still feel on high alert. Thank you for trusting this community with these very personal feelings and stories. Hearing others go through the same things helps so much!