Aging Alone—Finding Strength and Connection

Well, you do seem a hell of a lot younger! Nobody knows how much time they have. My husband only made it to 55. You could live to be 99. I had a neighbor who, at 93, still worked part-time and drove like she was a 16 year old who just got their license. The only thing she couldn't do was stairs, so she sold her house for a ranch. I have met people in my age group who behave as if they were already dead, so I understand not fitting in with others. The patronizing attitude towards women over 50 is insufferable and I imagine you deal with it way more than I do, which is too much!. UGH. There are so many stereotypes, especially for women, about how you should live your life as you age. They are jealous of your independence!

Yes, having a dog is nice, but as people age, you have to think about who will take care of the dog if you go to the great beyond. Not all family members can take on a pet or can afford a pet. Fostering a dog might be a better option because the shelters cover vet costs. You get the advantages of companionship while helping the dog get socialized until they find a permanent home.

Your comment “the patronizing attitude towards women over 50 is insufferable” is puzzling to me. Can you give an example?

I’m 65 and have never felt patronized.

Wow. That is amazing.

Find new friends !

Well, good for you! The fact that you are questioning my experience as a woman just proves my point. Are you male?
Every time I walk into a doctors office, their voice changes. It goes up an octave as if they are speaking to a child. I have to remind them I am a 58 year old woman, not a toddler. If your blunt and express your needs clearly, you're difficult. Any symptom you have is dismissed or written off as whiny woman syndrome. It happens to young women, too. Just the fact that can get a vasectomy referral without any long discussions says it all. Just because you didn't notice medical bias does not mean it does not exist.
https://magazine.hms.harvard.edu/articles/how-gender-bias-medicine-has-shaped-womens-health
https://www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/interactive/2022/women-pain-gender-bias-doctors/

I am a 65 year old woman.

I’m not saying you haven’t experienced what you say you have. And I’m not saying there is no medical bias.

I’m just saying I’m puzzled by your comment, the one I quoted, because I have never experienced it. At least, not as it relates to age, which is what you specified (women over 50).

I was asking for examples, not denying your experience as a woman.

The fact that you insisted on personal examples speaks volumes. There was nothing "puzzling" about my comment and you were the ONLY person who did not relate to this issue. Just because you did not experience something does not mean it does not exist. Have you considered that you're just not very perceptive of disrespect and dismissive attitudes toward women due to your own internalized misogyny?

I'm 61 and alone. I look ahead and worry sometimes. I have relocated a few times so each time make new friends. At least it's a current skill (: I imagine it is so important to be willing to engage the world. It can be in person, over a zoom, on a phone call. "Help someone" is what I will remember as the decade goes by.

Wow. You seem to have a lot of anger. I was just trying to understand what situations caused “insufferable patronization”.

Since you have chosen to call me a misogynist and asked me if I had considered that I just wasn’t perceptive enough to realize that I actually AM being disrespected, maybe you should consider that you might have a chip on your shoulder and a victim mentality. Maybe people are picking up on your negative attitude and anger (as is on full display here) and reacting to it.