I completely understand you and the situation with us is very similar : (.
My husband is pretty calm and patient and I am at my wits end.
If I did not have this forum which is abundant with such caring and extremely knowledgeable people I honestly don't know how would I have kept my sanity during all of those months. I also used this waiting period to educate myself about PC treatments and recovery. Our surgery is next month and after such a long period of waiting all of the sudden it looks "so close", that I am already in a state of panic. I am not worried about surgery per se, or side effects, I worry about a final pathology report since sometimes it does not match biopsy findings. I am not mentally ready to hear about potentially more worrying features present, but again, I will never be, so one can just go with a flow ... and hope ... and pray.
I did however put my husband on more restrictive diet and bunch of supplements and his PSA went down for abut more than 2 points. We test PSA every 6 weeks (on our expense) just to calm my nerves lol. He also had TRUS couple of weeks back (ultrasound examination) which confirmed that all is still contained in a prostate (knock the wood) *sigh. We are also being taken care of at center of excellence and I have to somehow learn to trust experts even though we ARE in this situation because our original urologist was a moron and did not follow correct AS protocol.
All in all, I wish your husband and you very successful treatment (whichever one you choose) and complete and forever eradication of a cancer : ). Your husband has more favorable findings than mine and you have many options for treatment and it is good to hear everybody out . My husband also wanted surgery and thought that consultations are just waste of time, but doctors insisted, so we had them. I must say that talking to RO was very useful in a sense that it confirmed our choice of having surgery even further. We however canceled focal therapy consultation since it really had no appeal for us since my husband has 4+3 and cribriform cells and probable IDC formations ( I say "probable" since one lab said they are there and the other that they are "probable" ). Those are aggressive features that were present in one single core of 16, BUT we have no desire to play with that.