I'm guessing this reply is too late but I wanted to weigh in.
Last summer my in-laws' health declined rapidly, my FIL had severe dementia and my MIL had a pacemaker and got a new battery in it and was not doing well, they had lived on their own until it was too many 911 calls, we lived 10 min from them and if my MIL went to the hospital my husband had to stay with his dad because he was not aware enough and would wander off.
It got to a point where we moved them in with us but it was a big mistake because of both in bad health and up all hours of the night, arguing or rummaging around the house, we were all losing our minds! we really tried! So my husband and I moved them back to their little house and my husband went there during the day and cooked them 3 meals a day and made sure there was ice cream for them for their midnight snack!
at some point 911 got called late at night because my MIL fell, and I went to the hospital to be with my MIL...
anyways things escalated health wise, hospice got involved, we hired a CNA to be there 8-5 at first then it ended up she stayed overnight M-F and my husband lived there on weekends!
At the end my MIL was on oxygen and heavy pain meds, I think liquid morphine my husband had to give his mom by squirting in her cheek! He felt like he was putting her down! She got worse and wasn't eating or even crying, we tried to get her into a hospice house locally but they refused and said she wasn't "actively" dying, I argued and said she hadn't eaten for a week etc. our hospice reworked the paperwork and resubmitted and it got accepted the next day but the hospice house didn't have a bed! We knew we'd run out of time, that my MIL would probably pass away that night, but she didn't and that morning, I went to see my husband there watching his parents and hospice called that they had a bed at the hospice house (a different company) so a nurse wasn't going to come because they'd arrange transfer that afternoon! I told them my FIL is now not eating and completely out of it, so the nurse agreed to come and just see him! She arrived maybe an hour or so later and we greeted her at the door and my husband walked by his mom's room and didn't see her chest moving! she had passed away!!
The nurse called TOD and called the morgue etc... I told my husband to tell his dad that his mom died, it took several different ways of saying it: Grandma died, your wife passed away, mom died etc.... and he just lowered his head and was sad! then I helped the nurse get my FIL in there to sit and hold my MIL's hand.... He was non-verbal at this time, no idea what's going on still, but once his felt his wife's hand he looked up and saw she had passed and lowered his head again and was just sad, not saying anything, not crying....
The funeral home people came and we had called our kids too.
All this happened for a reason, I didn't want grandma (my MIL) to die in the house, but if she hadn't, then grandpa wouldn't have been able to say goodbye that way! We also prayed over her body outside on a beautiful day! God's timing was perfect!
my FIL passed away 11 days later!
(and now my husband has stage 4 prostate cancer- plus I told that to my mom who's in a nursing home and she passed away 2 weeks after the diagnosis!) so..... ROUGH year! But God's got this!! It's ok to be sad and cry, I'm not looking forward to the day of my husband being at this point! I still have PTSD from my in-laws, and my mom (but she was overseas so I didn't get to see her)