Oh my goodness! I do not dare believe my situation is like yours. My heart goes out to you. My mother lived around the corner from me until about three weeks ago. She is 88 yrs old and mostly self-sufficient but I was spending time with her and care taking my husband. As my husband has progressed in his challenges it was simply impossible for me to devote time to both of them. I am fortunate. My sister came here, made arrangements, helped my mother get a place in an independent living facility near her and finally moved her and all her stuff. My mom loves her new apartment and friends at the facility which is also 6 miles from my sister. I am saying this because I cannot imagine you having to try to take care of your husband, yourself and make all the arrangements to move. I don't know how far you plan to move but I am praying that God will provide the people and the means for the move to be done for you and not by you.

I also related to the "disastrous results" comment. I have sure learned to do things I would not have imagined and to do them without being mad about it. Life certainly is an amazing journey. God bless you and please post here so that I know and others know ow you and your husband are getting along.

Thanks for your sweet words and your understanding. Nobody understands unless they've walked in your shoes! I wish our sons were closer...we're in Florida and they're in Michigan. I could use their strong backs to help with our move. Our daughter and two granddaughters are here but busy with jobs and kids, and also two hours away. It could always be worse...my next-door neighbor's husband is dying of cancer and not expected to make it to morning. I'll miss him, when you get older it happens with too much regularity. Hugs

Hi! You are obviously an intelligent woman who is accustomed to being independent and taking care of your own business. I so relate to that as I have been that way all of my life. It took this situation with my husband to break down some of those barriers because I could not maintain successfully. I don't know how serious you are about moving to Michigan. It may be an idea that sounds great but is not something that gives you much joy. I lived in Clearwater in the early 70's and I have been to Michigan in the winter. I will take Florida hands down. My head is full of suggestions for possible ways to get help with moving. I will reserve those thoughts. If you are serious about moving or get serious about moving just let me know. Not saying I have the magic answer but I am great at resourcing...lousy at math...great at other things.
16 years ago my parents moved to be near to me. My father had started having frequent bouts with his heart...little things at first but enough that they called me and I went when they called. I lived about 120 miles from them and missed work, etc. Fortunately I worked for the government so I had the leave but not endless leave. My father decided that they would move near me so that I could help them out without driving so far, etc. They moved around the corner and for a time were completely self-sufficient. They were much nearer doctors than they had been where they lived and all the stores, etc. were nearby. Time passed and my father died and then I looked after my mother. She is now 88 years old and, as I said, we have moved her to be near my sister. She is in a retirement community in independent living at the moment and loving it. God is good. All of these decisions were difficult. I understand your situation and I am going to be praying that God will open doors that you have no idea exist.
You will understand and laugh at this...I went to see the psychologist this morning and decided to go to the senior center to begin a daily 30 minute routine on an exercise machine. I need it for the exercise and for my mental health. When I got to the car my husband had called. Oh my, he could not get the t.v. to work (he forgets how to use the remotes) and did I give him his medications for the day. I said I will be right home. Honey, he was like a child jealous of my time. He needed lunch, he needed something to drink,he needed his medications, he needed a blanket so he could take a nap AND he has a knee that is hurting him so the doctor told me to use a machine I have from when I had knee surgery. It pumps cold water through a wrap that goes over the knee. My husband's doctor said I should use it on his knee 3 times a day. Oh my goodness! This is my husband.."It's too cold!" "Do I have to use it?" "How long does it have to stay on?" I had to put a thin towel over his knee so the cold would not "hurt" him. If I was Jewish that would have been an "Oy vey! moment. So I asked him if everything was fine and could I please do some other business now and he grinned and said, "Yes"! There are days and then there are DAYS! Much love! If you want to we can talk. Let me know and I will give you my phone number.