I no what you are going through Buddy I've lost count
how many times I've though about ending it all. I just can't see the point of fighting week in & week out at my age and for what we are never ever going to be the same again, we are only just Ginny pig from the Cancer research lot.

To @karinkb
From @dorothy1914
I am in a similar situation as you. The last two years have been terrible. I am now 78 and this has been the worst year of my life. I went off my antidepressant after 45 years (Effexor). I don’t even know what possessed me to do it. After numerous attempts to reinstate the Effexor (at least 4 times), I and my short-term therapists gave up. Every day is a struggle for me. I have aged terribly in these two years (wrinkled skin, hair loss). I lost 55 pounds in a matter of 3 months. My doctor described me as malnourished. I think I look like a monster. My best feature was always my curly strawberry blonde hair. It’s mostly gone now and I have resorted to wearing baseball caps. Sometimes I feel as if I can’t go on but I try because of financial reasons.