@elizabethbryant, Thank you for the big hug that you send to all of us who read this message. And I send you a sincere thank you for sharing your powerful testimony of your faith and the strength that it has provided for you during your difficult journey.
I especially love what you said: " Sharing on this site. "We light each others candle" with hope and helpful medical information." That is our goal for our Connect conversations. We can share with others freely, without judgment. I am happy that you are part of our discussion. Rosemary

@elizabethbryant Liz: What a great attitude you display in spite of your losses. i love the phase "We light each others candle" with hope and helpful medical information. So true of Mayo Connect! Thanks for that blessing! Teresa

@elizabethbryantI whole heartedly agree that I have received many blessings since my initial diagnosis and thru to the recurrence. Most people take a step back when I say that, they think that getting cancer is the end of your life, period, weather you die or not. in one aspect they are right it is the end of life "AS WE KNEW IT". There are so many things I am no longer able to do that were an integral part of my life....BUT....I have been blessed with TWO more grandchildren ( I was given 2-3 months ) I am really a happier person, I am more calm , all those URGENT THINGS I HAD TO GET DONE ARE NOT SO URGENT. I am calmer I am more accepting of things as they are...I have rarely said why me? I have said why not me? would I rather a young mother was suffering as I am?, absolutely not!!!! and most importantly my relationship with God has gotten so much better ,so much closer. My faith is so much stronger than it was. How can I not be happy about that?!!!
And being able to share your thoughts with someone that truly understands where you are coming from.....that is a blessing
I have a friend who also was given a terminal diagnosis and we have shared often. I expect to see him today. this will be a test of love and strength because he is very close to the end and being witness to his sadness and pain can only make me more aware of when it will be my time, he has asked to see me today ( he is often not up to visitors ) so I will go and hopefully come away with an insight I did not have and feeling blessed that I knew him.
I usually struggle to share ( I want to keep everyone around me happy) but I was so moved by your comments I felt the need. Thank You

Yes! You have evolved in that you have come to the realization that each and every moment that you can share with a loved one and let go of all the trivial things we all hang on to in out lives is what counts. It is a spiritual awakening in that you now understand the value and precious moments in life. It is a sense of freedom and peace.

Thank you!

Yes, it amazing when a perfect stranger with a loving word and touch goes a long way to help you feel that you are not alone in your battle.

Hi Teresa, I hope all is well with you. It has been a relapse day for me and this cancer has left me
isolated from family and it seems the world. I don't speak clearly at times and the world can be cold
and hard. I worked the leaves yesterday with my riding mower which made the allergy even worse.
It should be better by tomorrow. I miss the husband that I married, he was with me some what during
the surgery, but had a health episode and I haven't heard from him and I have to get over this
loss and all the loss of who I was. I am the same person on the inside in my heart but everyone
is leaving. Just a really bad day I guess. I just hear negative information about this type of cancer.
I just needed someone to talk to and care tonight. Thanks for your caring on this site. Elizabeth

@elizabethbryant I'm pleased to be a caring friend on Mayo Connect. I do admire the steps you take to care for yourself. By the way, have you looked into speech therapy to help you communicate more effectively? After my vocal cord surgery (implant) I had a lot of speech therapy (almost every year). Perhaps that would help with your communication so that you could be understood better, or maybe a computer-assisted device that you could use and take with you? Just some thoughts, I know how isolated you feel. Hugs, Teresa

Thanks Teresa for responding. Lichen planus condition and Severe dysplasia are the issue and John
Hopkins surgeon stated speech therapy would only worsen the condition and I agree. I have limited
amount of speech because the inflammation......raw tissue gets so bad under my tongue.

@elizabethbryant I'm so sorry that there aren't some better answers for you. Keep up your faith! Teresa