Sadly i think those thoughts are with us for life! I didnt have any pain before now i do and thats what rattles me as Dr Sangah said any Pain let us know .... but how do i work out what is "pain" from "pain" i have had a huge surgery and i am very active again with parts missing sent into Menopause without any warning , how do i differentiate what "is" what from the "other" .... then i get myself into a tizz-woz thinking i am done for! Just a horrible thought and why us?
Its the mental damage too not just the Cancer or the Operations , i feel like i have had my brain removed too! I have a very demanding career i am back at work and currently working now but dropped on as i seen an email saying i had a response. I now sit at my desk and completly forget what i am doing! I have a family too my daughters 16 and Son 10 , they will need to be tested for this gene too , i sit and wonder if i have gave them the "penalty" now too! This came from my Grandfather , he died at 35 but the research wasnt around then and my mum was 1 years old, so i never knew him. Then my Mum 16 years ago had Uterine Cancer , removed and Mum is still here and turns 70 in June , then it was my turn , im 40 and mine was Clear Cell .... i want to and WILL get to 70 , im going to keep at my fitness and diet and just have to embrace the pain in the process as i want to see my family grow up and retire with my Partner and have a nice life. I wish you all the best , may i ask how long you have been clear? x