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Finding a Sense of Purpose in MCI May 15 7:16pm | By Dr. Anni Shandera-Ochsner, HABIT Midwest Director (@dranneshanderaochsner)Comment receiving replies
Since my sister passed 2 years ago, I feel so lost, she was not well and depended on me to take her places and we shopped together, or went for lunches or she liked me to come over for dinner at least twice a week. She was very controlling and opinionated but I could not bring myself to tell her no, even if I had other plans. Had I only known how much I would miss so much about her daily calls and taking her places. Everyone told me to stand up for myself, so I did and we didn’t speak for a few weeks. She called me the day I was on my way to the airport for a trip. I was too busy to answer. She passed away a few days after I got to Mexico. I regret every day that I didn’t say goodbye to her, and that our last conversation was an argument. I haven’t felt a sense of purpose since then.
Replies to "Since my sister passed 2 years ago, I feel so lost, she was not well and..."
@bluebird1953, that is hard to make peace with. It is hard to find joy or purpose when you are burdened with regret. I agree with @elm123. Please find time and space to forgive yourself for the things you cannot change. Focus on the good and happy memories. You were an important part of your sister's life and she of yours.
Is there something that you can do for others in her honor? Volunteering perhaps? Planting a special patch in the garden? Or something that would have brought her joy?
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Try to remember all the good and funny times you had together - that is a way to honor your sister. My sister died three years ago and I still miss her very, very much. I try to be thankful that we shared such a great relationship, but of course there were times when we fought. I think that shows how important we were to each other. Thinking of you and hoping you feel better.