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How do I deal with my husband? Transplant patient changed demeanor
Transplants | Last Active: Mar 31 12:08pm | Replies (32)Comment receiving replies
His transplant coordinator talks with him and it's not when I am present. He will not let me attend his appointment anymore. From what I see he only goes for labs once a month and xray. I believe twice a year. Since the first year of the his transplant I have not been apart and that's because he do not want me to. I do not know if he is sharing his behavior with them. I do know I mentioned it to his doctor when he went to the restroom and she asked him how was his moons and he was not truful about. Since that visit he do not share with me any of his concerns or discussions with his transplant coordinator. Nor medication changes, nothing! I do take a picture of his meds to try and keep updated with those. I tried being apart and supportive, he say they are not talking to me, but him and he can answer and ask his own questions. He says I'm not a child, I don't need you to act like you're my mother. My hands are tired. He has completely shut me out of the loop. The only time I am able to be apart is when it's time to take a trip to the emergency room, but that has not been in a long time.
Replies to "His transplant coordinator talks with him and it's not when I am present. He will not..."
Hi, I just saw your story and as a Heart transplant recipient myself I can relate to how transplants can change someone. I remember early in my treatment that I was a bit short tempered the first few weeks after transplant. For me it resolved itself when I reduced my medications down from the high levels I started on. Prednisone is the culprit for mood swings. Luckly for me I was able to completely get off of that one. If he is still on it, it may be a factor in his mood. I would suggest if He had his transplant at mayo for you to contact the social worker dept. Im sure His Doctors would like to know your concerns. I know my team asks about my wife at every visit. She joins me most of the time but due to some Hip surgery it has become difficult but this last yearly visit she joined into the conversation by cell phone. So my prayers are with you and as someone else said God knows your situation. Prayer is a powerful tool that you have at your disposal.
Blessings
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I think you need to take care of yourself for the moment. I wonder if it wouldn't help you to see a therapist to get some help with how you can deal with the situation. It doesn't seem like there is much to be done with your husband for the moment. At least you need to protect yur own well being so that you are ready to handle whatever is going to happen. You need to feel strong enough to handle whatever is coming. Don't take it personally. It sounds like he is not in his right mind at this time, but you have to be careful not to let this upset your well being too.