We joined an Alzheimer’s Day Center. My spouse, the patient, hates it

Posted by ireneviola @ireneviola, Feb 17 1:15pm

We joined the Alzheimer’s Day Center to help my husband socialize and stimulate his brain through their activities. I attend the Support Group while he is with his group. He hates going and stresses about it all week. It’s only one day a week right now for a couple of hours. The Support Group strongly encourages me to keep bringing him, that in time he will actually start enjoying it. But I’m not seeing any evidence of this yet. Any suggestions?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers Support Group.

Becky, Volunteer Mentor | @becsbuddy | Feb 17 3:10pm

@ireneviola Welcome to the Caregivers group. It’s a wonderful group and I’m sure you will get lots of tips by ‘experts.’ What made you suddenly join today?

celia16 | @celia16 | Feb 17 6:19pm

If you keep trying, maybe he will eventually forget he doesn’t like it. That’s what we are doing with my dad and his dislike of the home health aid coming twice weekly. He fusses the whole time, but I say consoling things and assure him the aid will continue to come. I repeatedly remind him, it’s for the best, it helps us all and is not negotiable. Which all are true. The last time, I couldn’t be present and my mon said he didn’t protest at all. Yaay!

ireneviola | @ireneviola | Feb 18 8:25am

Ok. Thank you

crankyyankee | @crankyyankee | Feb 18 12:59pm

Was he a social guy before? My husband was not but his neurologist suggested he attend the local senior center weekly lunch to socialize. That would have killed him before any disease. This I know. He's perfectly happy relaxing in his recliner all day.

ireneviola | @ireneviola | Feb 18 8:48pm

Yes. He was very social. Sitting at home all day everyday not interacting with others does not sound healthy. I’ve learned through others that they need that stimulation and that being alone too much is not a good thing. He tends to get depressed .

celia16 | @celia16 | Feb 19 5:21am

I tried to get my dad to attend the local Senior Center back before he became so weak, but he refused. Now, he’s so immobile…..getting him to the doctor with his transport chair is a monumental task that exhaust him. Do immobile people attend the meetings?

ireneviola | @ireneviola | Feb 19 8:55am

At this Center they do. They provide assistance to whoever needs it in every way. Good, compassionate people. They categorize the groups according to level of dementia.

alicat60 | @alicat60 | Mar 3 9:03pm

I used to work for a place like this. It could be many reasons for this. Depends on the activities they are having that he doesn’t like. Or that anxiety they all get when separated from their spouses or family members. Or it simply could be he just doesn’t want to socialize with these people. They keep saying to bring him because, well.., it’s a business after all. Are you paying for him to go or is it a free group? Good luck.