I thought the same thing. I actually cried and grieved over my donor on the operating table just before anesthesia. I was refusing my transplant offer for the same reasons as you are feeling. I was persuaded, actually begged by my family and doctors to accept that gift of life. I feel a very close connection to my donor. She is my hero and at some moment as she lived her life she thought of me and agreed to be an organ donor. I believe your donor and you are destined. The liver you will be offered IS meant for YOU and only you. I am coming up on my first year. I feel great and am used to the adjustments I needed to make. I take my meds in the morning and at night, eat fairly clean and am very active. Every time I have a milestone or a great moment to celebrate, it's like an encore for my hero's life too. God Bless and I'll start praying for you!!