Denise, my gosh, gurl… You’re under unimaginable stress taking care of your husband who doesn’t seem to care about his health at all anymore. I guess from his perspective, he’s pretty much convinced this is the end of the line so he’s just going to take the drugs, smoke his multiple packs of cigarettes and the heck with everything else. As you suggested, that combination of strong narcotics, Xanax, caffeine and nicotine are all impacting his cognitive ability.

You are between a rock and a hard spot, my dear. I hope you’re able to sit in with the Palliative care doctor visit today. Are you able to have a list of questions to ask for yourself? That doctor needs to know about the extra meds your husband is taking, his declining behavioral skills with simple tasks such as making coffee, and such. Don’t hesitate to ask for direction on how to get the best help for both your husband AND you!

I hope you are able to take decompression breaks. I’m more worried about you than your husband, quite frankly. You’re bearing a load of stress trying to care for your partner who has basically given up. I’m a hugger and there’s nothing I want more right now than to reach through this computer and give you a bear hug! You need support.

Do you have friends or family nearby to lend a hand or personally be there for moral support?