Connect
← Return to Anyone familiar having lymphoma without treatment?
Discussion
Anyone familiar having lymphoma without treatment?
Blood Cancers & Disorders | Last Active: Dec 30, 2024 | Replies (23)Comment receiving replies
I don't even know how to start. She has gotten really bad over the past few days. Shes getting weaker and still can't eat or drink very much at all. They are on the fence about hospice my husband mainly he doesn't want to not try to get her some relief and take her to the DR or ER. We do not know where the cancer has spread to because she has refused the CT scan at her oncologist, her primary scheduled her for one to know what is goin on so he knows how to make her comfortable and what he can do. She didn't make the appt she was too weak. She's gagging and throwing up phlegm thick phlegm she doesn't eat enough to throw anything else up. They want to respect her wishes but nobody wants to ask her what exactly that is. I will not ask it's not my place to do that it's her children who should. I don't understand that. Hospice has now come to the front of conversation and yet they can't decide. I give my opinion but at the end of the day it's not up to me! VERY BAD DAY
Replies to "I don't even know how to start. She has gotten really bad over the past few..."
Hello, @msmac1 You’ve been on my mind so much the past few days and just wanted to check in to see how your mother-in-law is doing. I hope she and the rest of her children have finally acquiesced to allow hospice to take care of her and that she’s more comfortable now. Holding you in my thoughts with a gentle hug.
Connect
Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry I missed this post yesterday about the very bad day!
You’re between a rock and a hard place at this juncture.
It sounds like your mother in law may be ending up in the ER at some point soon, simply because she’s getting so frail, her symptoms are escalating and she may have some type of event at home that will demand immediate attention.
Her family is in the same state of denial about their mother, as mom is herself. Sadly, they’re going to pussyfoot around the issue of ‘mom’s final wishes’ until they run out of time.
It’s a very sad situation and a shame that you’re caught up in this as the only reasonable person who has the best interest of your mother-in-law at heart.
I would hope you can have a sit down, heart to heart with your husband and rest of the family. But you’re right, it is not up to you. You’ve done a really special and wonderful labor of love giving your mother in law such tender care and attention. Can you quietly talk to her about her last wishes and to write things down without the other family members around? Or record a conversation on your phone so that you can provide it later?
I hope today was better for all of you and that there is some consensus with the family to get their mom the care she needs.
Wish I were able to reach through the computer to give you a deep hug…you could use one.