After Cancer

Posted by Denise @denisestlouie, Dec 5 4:27pm

After Cancer is what I'm going to call the time after I finish Chemotherapy. I didn't have any signs of cancer outside the tumor and even though the staging was a 3, I didn't have any evidence of cancer in any of the key areas pelvic wash, myometrium invasion, LVI or any of the 5 lymph nodes biopsied. So, I decided to take a page out of Princess Catherine's story and call the therapy (chemo) "preventive." That worked for me for just a moment. Then I started to get a better understanding of the aggressive nature of the cancer I have, and I felt there was no hope for the long term. I even questioned the purpose for chemotherapy when it is known this cancer has a way of avoiding the drugs. But you know I want to live! Because I want to grow very old I just pushed on and I did everything I could to support my body while receiving the treatments.

This has been difficult for a lot of reasons. Of course there are the obvious things, the inconvenience of all the appointments and blood draws, giving up a day to sit in an infusion room, not always feeling well and losing my hair. There were also things that caused to much stress that I didn’t know would happen like finding out I don’t like the way the care coordinator treats me or for how she would not even give me the time of day when I really needed someone to help me understand what would happen if my neutrophilia didn’t return to acceptable levels in time. Or that even dust getting under contact could develop into a serious eye infection. Or I would ride an emotional rollercoaster. This has been a hard 6 months. This Phase ends in just a few days then it’s all about recovery.

I’m looking forward to recovery. I will still be receiving treatment every 21 days for 18 cycles, but that drug won’t delay my hair growth and won’t make me sick to my stomach. I am very happy that I’m eligible to receive maintenance therapy. It showed some very promising outcomes for people with my type of cancer cell line. So, for all the reasons I listed above I’m calling the next phase After Cancer. I want to believe I no longer have cancer. It’s gone.
I am going to have to develop some pretty good coping strategies that will help me deal with the unknown. I have such anxiety around annual mammograms. I can only imagine that happening 4 more times every year. I do have an action plan though. Its all about me. Really, I mean that. I’m going to make sure that I take care of me. I’m following the take-off instructions of the airline attendant. Please put your own oxygen mask on before assisting anyone else.
Denise

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Gynecologic Cancers Support Group.

Cheering you on Denise. You are truly an inspiration!

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@celia16

Good luck today!

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Thank you. I didn't sleep one minute last night.
I'm not nervous about today I'm angry with the support staff who late on Friday schedule 4 appointments for diagnostic stuff with our consulting me and I'm not going to be town for 2 of them. She does this every time and I have to reschedule such a waste of effort

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@denisestlouie

Thank you. I didn't sleep one minute last night.
I'm not nervous about today I'm angry with the support staff who late on Friday schedule 4 appointments for diagnostic stuff with our consulting me and I'm not going to be town for 2 of them. She does this every time and I have to reschedule such a waste of effort

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So, did it happen (final treatment ) or must you reschedule?

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YES!!!!!! I am going to write about it today. I'm thinking through what I want to say now

I did make up for lack of sleep. I went out for dinner. Got home took out my contacts, took off my hair and put on comfy clothes. I laid down on my bed just for a second. I woke up this morning on top of the covers and fully clothed. I feel amazing this morning. Steroids help you know:)

Hey, Celia thank you for checking on me.
Denise

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@denisestlouie

YES!!!!!! I am going to write about it today. I'm thinking through what I want to say now

I did make up for lack of sleep. I went out for dinner. Got home took out my contacts, took off my hair and put on comfy clothes. I laid down on my bed just for a second. I woke up this morning on top of the covers and fully clothed. I feel amazing this morning. Steroids help you know:)

Hey, Celia thank you for checking on me.
Denise

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Oh to make today special I have 3 medial appointments non directly related to cancer, but they are. 1. Therapist 2 Holistic doctors office for magnesium treatment, 3. Eye doctor to follow-up on eye infection. Its healed im already wearing my contacts. I scratched in mid Oct. Its taken really long to heal. Weaken immune system. That was the only issue I had, well two issues, emotional Rollercoaster and eye infection.

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Congratulations, Denise! I’m cheering you on and love your upbeat attitude. I've read that cancer is not just about treatment but also about one's mindset.
You reminded me of my mom's uterine cancer journey at the beginning.
A few months after her surgery, she began experiencing intense pain at the bottom of her spine, specifically on her coccyx. I remember her oncologist recommending an arthritis patch for the pain.
During one of the visits while I was waiting for my mom to finish her treatment, the oncologist’s assistant approached me. She asked why I seemed to take so much pride in questioning everything the oncologist said, especially since I wasn't a doctor. I was taken aback by her comment and told her that my mother was my priority, and I felt it was my responsibility to advocate for her.

Ultimately, we decided to move my mom to a better hospital with excellent care and compassionate staff.
I am truly grateful to God that she is still with us today. If we had left her under the care of that original surgeon/oncologist, I believe she would not have survived.
By the way, the pain in her coccyx is due to a tumor that she still has.
Many blessings to you on your journey. ❤️

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@denisestlouie

YES!!!!!! I am going to write about it today. I'm thinking through what I want to say now

I did make up for lack of sleep. I went out for dinner. Got home took out my contacts, took off my hair and put on comfy clothes. I laid down on my bed just for a second. I woke up this morning on top of the covers and fully clothed. I feel amazing this morning. Steroids help you know:)

Hey, Celia thank you for checking on me.
Denise

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Congrats! Your excitement is well deserved. Glad you got that good rest. And, dining out. Good luck with your plans. I suffer eye issues and know how that can impact you. I found acupuncture quite helpful for my eye issues.

So glad things are going well. Your positivity is contagious.

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