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Coping and Overwhelmed
Hello,
I am having some issues with coping with my husbands stage IV cancer reoccurrence. He was diagnosed with Stage IV metastatic colon cancer which has traveled to his liver and omentum in 2022. He was 53 at the time. He had several surgeries last year which we thought would extend his life for several years. We thought he might even beat it. Apparently this is not the case. Currently, cancer has returned to all areas and even more in the colon than before. I am overwhelmed with sadness and questions. Selfishly I am wondering how I will survive his cancer (I am 60 years old) and how my son will survive his cancer living in the same home. My son suffers from depression and anxiety so I am very concerned. I am very sensitive to others pain and tend to get sick myself when stressed out. I know I need to find a way to be a good caregiver without making myself sick but I don't know how.
We recently moved across the country and my husband is lacking friends but have his parents about an hour away. His parents are not very good at being supportive and are in their late 70s. I have friends and a few relatives that live a couple hours away. I feel like my friends don't really want to be involved in all this sadness. They have their own lives, their own troubles. I just don't know where to turn for help. I just started a new job and can hardly focus on what I need to be doing. I have so many questions like how will I afford my home, will I ever retire, etc. Maybe you all have some pointers you can share. I pray a lot but I'm not really getting any answers.
Thanks for listening. I'll get through it somehow.
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I hope you get some responses. I don’t have any information about your situation, but wanted to show support. Sometimes, people don’t know what to say, so they say nothing. I know that’s not right.
I am very sorry for your circumstances. It must be extremely painful and stressful. Talk therapy helps me. I hope you and your family’s situation improves.
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3 ReactionsThank you Celia ❤️
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1 ReactionHello. I am so sorry you are going through this! I know that their are not alot that I can say to let you know I honestly care. Please know I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. ❤️❤️
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2 ReactionsThank you 💓
My husband had a recurrence of esophageal cancer in February after being in remission since mid-2020. He was initially diagnosed in 2018 at the age of 55 at stage IV. The prognosis was months to a year. Our 2 adult sons were 28 and 30 at that time. It's overwhelming, I know. Over these 4 years before the recurrence, he's had a very good quality of life. We've traveled and spent time with people we love. I felt more blindsided with the recurrence than I did the first time. He was so ill when he was diagnosed in 2018. This time, absolutely no symptoms at all. Shock. After chemo and radiation, he's once again with no evidence of disease.
I too felt somewhat isolated and grief stricken, even though we have family and friends nearby who offer much support. It's not selfish to worry, it's human. I have received a lot of comfort on this site from people in similar situations.
Even though my husband is again back to no evidence of disease, I know we can't forget that it's lurking. I too worry so much about my children and how they process all the ups and downs. I worry about my husband suffering and dying and what I would do about our house, bills, etc. I'm 60 as well, he's 61. Too young to have gone through so much.
I'm not a religious person per se but I'm very spiritual and I "talk" to my beloved mother in law who passed several years ago, asking for relief from the anxiety. I will keep your family in my thoughts. Hang in there
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