I have been helping my father with his stage 4 cancer for 2 years now. The doctors are surprised that he is still driving, using only a cane, and working outside with advanced metastatic prostate cancer. They say they have never seen scans like his and are amazed he is alive. Now he my sisters have come in and the will is magically changing with his memory , confusion, and brain fog issues very apparent. Along with moving out of state per his wishes.Expecting me to hand over and hold their hand through everything while also pointing out how it's not enough. It's been just myself no support and no access to help since day 1. I figured it all out alone while managing a divorce, school bullies, counseling services, researching, court, and personal medical issues, along with a child on the spectrum, and another with speech. During all this the previous fights got physical and broke my faith in my support system. My uncle passed away and I was helping him and caregiving for him as well. My friends passed away and moved during this time as well.
I'm so angry, resentful, hurt, sad, regretful, guilty, tired, exhausted, beyond burnt out, jealous, and defeated. I stopped knowing what hope is, I cry when I feel a smile, and breakdown when I laugh. There's so much I want to say, scream, shout and yell, but mostly I just want to be heard, comforted, understood, appreciated, acknowledged, helped. Nothing major but not added stress.

Why is it so hard to understand that I just want them to send a link to a helpful app, support groups, or supplements I pay for out of my pocket, or medical equipment. Even a card to say hey.
I may not be doing anything right. I may not be doing enough. But I know I've sacrificed everything I have for my father and his health. I know I wake up everyday and I give it my best and more, but after 2 years it's not even close to what it used to be. I'm just thankful I can still get up everyday. How can they see what they are doing is not OK? I know they are just doing what they think is best but they haven't been in the trenches.