How do you deal with aging?

I have to add that I stated I had no close friends. I have friends. I live now in a rural area with not really any services for seniors. There are some but in other towns, I’d have to pay to join the senior centers. Also I don’t like driving at night now. Many activities I see listed are at night. You must have a car here ? I do but as I said I don’t like driving at night. I have volunteered at a nature center which is now a 20 mile drive away ( I used to be close enough to walk or bike there). Many activities ( for the volunteers are at night). I had a ‘good’ friend there for 10 years: she decided to ghost me because she preferred hanging out with other divorced women she met elsewhere ( she started bar hopping! We are both now 77). I just laugh because I don’t need those kind of friends ❤️

Good evening @mydogsbestfriend. I sure love that you honored your dog with that name. My Cavalier King Charles spaniels were named Kala, Reggie, and Roxie. And if the truth be known, I met quite a few folks who really just wanted to learn about the breed. Perhaps because they sat on my desk in my art gallery and performed tricks for treats, they initiated friendships.

I was introduced to many of my friends through mindfulness, meditation, Yoga, and Mahjongg. Even when I moved to new areas.....I would find out where these groups might be meeting and accept invitations to attend.

For example, I was invited to a Retreat one weekend. As a result of positive interactions, l was invited to a monthly "meet up". I then found myself providing space for the monthly meet-up in my home. And now three of us have formed a "Trio Chat" because we seem to be on the same page about many subjects. And Mahjongg has been a friendship game in my life for about 20 years. Recently, I have noticed that my memory is declining and the other players often have to play catch up for me. It is probably time to move on. But I can't do that without mentioning the friendships I have found and treasured right here on Connect.

The reality of friendships on Connect is that everyone seems to live down South in the US or across the ocean in another country with different time zones. However, I treasure the opportunities even if I have little chance of meeting anyone in person.

Good luck with your efforts to get up at 5 a.m. to share friendship with someone in Scotland.
My grandmother was Scottish and dressed me in her clan's plaids.

Friends can be very interesting and add human differential qualities to your life. Good luck to you.
Chris

??? I don’t get up at 5 am to have a friend in Scotland. ??!

We can loosely group our mental experiences into two major realms.
One is all our thoughts and feelings about the outer world, the "not me" world.
The other is all our thoughts and feelings about ourselves, the "me" world and how I fit (or don't fit) in the "not me" world.

It seems that this discussion concerns the "me" world, as this is where most of our difficult emotions occur.
Perhaps the most important self-management skill is remembering that all emotions pass if we let them, even the most painful.
But the "me" world is also where our many wonderful emotions occur. We can learn to wait for them and savor them.

For me, it has been necessary to learn that there is no perfect, always feel good fix to the flow of my moods. I can, however, usually observe them with a certain wry enjoyment. I can wink at myself.

Finally, there are the moments when the boundaries between the "me" and "not me" worlds temporarily open:
-Really good friends with whom we can sometimes share some of the "me" world feelings! Wow!
-Special moments with nature and art when our hearts open to the wonder of something "other" out there.
-And for some of us, non-verbal muscle-to-muscle, nerve to nerve connections we may feel with our lovers...and our pets!

hello friend. your comments were so familiar.I turned 80 in July and it was a weird thing, approaching that, because no birthday had ever effected me like this. I'm fairly healthy, move a little slower, tire out a little faster, have minor ailments of aging, but still walk ok, and live alone, saving my sweet cat. I heard a good term for my anxiety. uncharted waters. no family member had ever lived this long so i didn't really know what to expect. the day after by turning 80 was like no more anxiety about age! nothing changed. business as usual. so don't worry and keep going. you said your not spiritual but my faith sustains me. the bible says 70-80 years show special mightiness. be well

Add me to the "no real close friends" list.

Lost my dearest-closest-friend-ever two years during Covid. We were best buds for nearly 35 years.

Have friends, but not geographically close... so it's tough to develop a close relationship... especially while we're plenty busy caring for someone whose condition demands a significant amount of time / effort.

I didn’t suggest you change religion. I have no idea what religion you are. I just meant for you to find a congregation in your religion that makes you feel welcome & comfortable. Then you can make friends with people, young & old. Good luck.

I have no family near me and most of my friends have died. Making new friends is more than challenging, I haven't found any new friends. I am alone and stay at home. It's a bore, to say the least!

Are there organizations or groups that you might be interested in joining in order to meet new friends? My mother was forced to retire at 65 and spent the rest of her life (until she passed at 91) volunteering. (She was widowed when she was only 47 and never remarried.)
She used to say, "I don't know how I ever had time to work!" LOL! I'm planning on retiring this month after spending 43 years loving my career and have every intention of staying very involved in various volunteer organizations. It's a great way to meet folks with common interests. Staying at home as you mentioned isn't a way to meet new friends. 🙂

I've spent the last 20 years volunteering at 3 different jobs. Meals on Wheels, Habitat for Humanity and Forgotten Cats. I had to quit all of them because of the often recurring spasm in a back muscle that no doctor, so far, has been able to stop! So, not only am I in pain but I have no distractions!!