Scary,strange,possibly"near death"symptoms:begging for some insight

@giselleanne82 I am curious to know what was the ER's diagnosis was??

Worried
Dawn

Hi @giselleanne82. We haven't heard from you since the very scary night you had with your husband earlier this month. How is he doing? What explanations did your doctor give for the episode and what are you doing now to help prevent it from happening again?

I'm curious to know where you and your husband live? I moved from MI to FL 2 years ago. I'm 46. NO support in SW FL but LOVE tropical weather. But health care HORRIBLE here. Is it Fort Meyers, FL or Florida all together. Being disabled/experienced RN from MI I KNOW the difference if good/bad care.
What happened with your husband? I have multiple issues right now. Was brain in 2003 then gastrointestinal now have Lupus and end liver disease from becoming an alcoholic during sad divorce 10 years ago. How has your husband's care been with Mayo? Did they coordinate his care well? Come to a diagnoses and treat him well? Thank you. Kelly

Since this group was "Just want to talk" I need to just talk to some one. All my friends are at work and I don't want to worry them. Most do not know about the return of my cancer anyway so hard to explain to them why I am so anxious and nervous. Next week go back to Dr. another PET/CT to see how they are acting. If there has been a lot of growth in the last 8 weeks we go to the next step. It is so hard just waiting it is driving me CRAZY this time, my husband doesn't understand at all ! I get so irritated with him he will say things like "why don't I just do......" whatever it is this time or why don't I have ....done ?
I could scream !!!!!!! I am so tired of "being so strong" "looking so good" (translation= she must not really be that sick) But it is what is expected of me so I just do it. I feel I can't let people down they depend on me, even people I don't know hold me up as some shining example of how to handle it.......how do I let them know I am just falling apart inside? I don't thats' how.
I am not really looking for any advice I just needed to let it out somehow. I just need next week to be here knowing ...one way or the other....is always better.

Hi Allison,
I'm calling in the "just need to be heard" brigade. @merilee @rosemarya @hopeful33250 @jimde @wandering @saltis @rae3 and @alpaca, please read @allisonsnow's message. Let's pull up a chair and be active listeners. She just wants to talk to people who have been there and who get it.

She's dealing with a mess of scanxiety, tired of "being strong" and "but you look great" stuff.

We're listening Allison. Let that steam out!

Hi Allison & all others out there,
I know exactly how you feel. When my husband talks to others about our cancer and that this new chemo is not doing well for us, it cracks me up. We are not having another child, my cancer has become stage 4 and spread to chest and other parts. I am the one caughing, dealing with my death and leaving my life & you & my children and the rest of my family and friends. I am the one who is not going on holiday with our children or grandchildren. So please stop saying we.... Then there are those who doubt that you are suffering from cancer because you look fresh, laugh and make jokes. They turn to you and ask if you are sure? Sure about having cancer? You explain and suddenly they start telling you stories about some person who survived after using some strange herb which grows beside a river in Spain or maybe it was in Swaziland!
What I mean dear Allison, scream, stump your foot, tell hush to people who doesn't respect your situation or just do as I do, go for a walk instead of standing there, feeling inadequate, tired or defenseless. It helps to calm your nerves, nature has a way to offer you serenity and helps you to breath. It may even make the person who make stupid comments, to think about what was said & make him/her realize it is time to behave. Unfortunately you are alone with your cancer but you are loved by so many. Send you a lot of positive energy.

@allisonsnow, I am here. And I am all ears. I offer you a virtual shoulder and a big hug and I hope that you can feel some extra love from Kentucky. You don't have to be strong or anything like that in front of me.
I remember, for me, how the time seemed to almost come to a halt while waiting for a serious procedure with results. And while I wanted it to hurry up, too. That was awful. I waited for a cancer diagnosis, then I waited for an organ transplant. I know how hard it is to wait.
How are you feeling? are you eating and sleeping reasonable well? Will you have to travel to your doctor appointment, or is it nearby?
I'm going to go to dinner with my husband in a little while. But I will be checking in when we get home.
What would you ask me or say if I was right there with you?
Rosemary

Hello Alison. You articulate just how I have felt at many times in the cancer process. I feel I've used up all my family's and friends' support. It's not as easy as saying "Get a support team around you" - not if you have been sick on and off quite often and still look good and function well. Husbands and other partners often don't understand. I think only those who have travelled on the cancer or chronic illness rollercoaster really get it. I don't know what your condition is, but I am a four time cancer survivor with varying degrees of panic surrounding each case. I've painted myself into a stoic corner where I seem so tough, no-one even asks me when my check-ups are any more. My best bet for understanding and support come from my new friends in the head and neck cancer support group here. I don't want to worry my adult kids about it any more. I go to all my appointments by myself now and won't call for company until I have to! That is actually quite a bad attitude on my part and there's a wee bit of self-pity attached, but it's working for me right now.
So, yes, I do understand. Your beautiful venting hits the nail on the head perfectly. I get it and so will hundreds of others. No one can be staunch all the time. Telling someone - writing it down - all good. BEST WISHES!

Hello all...I have another scan next week...I always worry..About nodes they are watching..I was DX Stage 2A in 2015. Positive in a few nodes.. had a.Local reoccurance.several months later. In mid chest..Radiation and chemo..Dr said was probably there before but to small...Anyway. I have family support sometimes ..But at times seems I am supporting family with there issues..
Younger brother with severe panic over the past 20 yrs.. and now possibly dementia...And a sister with fibro etc..Constant pain...And meds..So yes sometimes I find more support in these sites or the few friends I have...Sad isn't it..

Just found your post. I retired to Fort Myers, Florida too. I'm being treated by doctors at Florida Cancer Specialists in Cape Coral. My diagnosis is recurring BC metastisis to the bone. I have been receiving hormone treatments for 2 years. Wonder if you go to the Cancer Center on Colonial near Rt. 75???? They have a support group that meets monthly. I also go to meetings with a support group at Seven Lakes on Cleveland Ave. in Fort Myers. I went to Moffet in Tampa for a second opinion and they concurred with my treatment. Doesn't sound like you have any cancer or am I misunderstanding your post. You certainly have enough issues. How are you doing now...your post was from October!!!