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Meet fellow Caregivers - Introduce yourself
Caregivers | Last Active: Nov 12, 2023 | Replies (707)Comment receiving replies
Hello Everyone, My name is Ben. I live in Los Angeles with my 98 year old mother. I'm her primary caregiver, although I have some hired help who assist me and an older brother who lives near San Francisco who flies down once every couple of months. Mom's health has been, overall pretty good. She has A-Fib and is too thin, but is able to eat and drink and carry a conversation. She can walk the length of the house with a walker and a great deal of assistance, but is unable to dress or bathe herself. We're a Chinese family-- luckily, we live in an area where there are alot of Chinese restaurants and supermarkets nearby, and I've been able to hire help who can cook Chinese dishes and speak to her in Cantonese. I'm looking forward to joining this group and sharing experiences. I'm particularly interested in hearing from folks of different ethnic backgrounds and exploring cultural and generational factors in caregiving.
Replies to "Hello Everyone, My name is Ben. I live in Los Angeles with my 98 year old..."
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Hello @tingkun55 Very nice to e-meet you here on Connect, Ben! I am Scott (aka IndianaScott) referred to by @kanaazpereira
I welcome you to Connect and hope you enjoy the interactions we all have here! For me the best part of Connect is exactly what you are seeking -- the sharing of experiences and having the opportunity to learn in such an inclusive, open environment.
I was my wife's primary caregiver for 14+ years while she fought her war with brain cancer. She was diagnosed at 49. It is great to hear your mother is able to do so much at 98! That is wonderful as is the support you have in your community and the quality hired help.
In our personal case we are a pretty average, Caucasian family. Living in a smaller community about an hour outside of Chicago. I am not sure it is a cultural difference, but in our case we basically had no support whatsoever from the community as well as our extended families. My wife's disease caused her to have many mental and emotional challenges, which cared most folks away from her. The burden for her care fell to our immediate family of myself and our two adult children (one who is half a continent away). I come from a small family (two siblings) and my wife had five. In our case none of these individuals were at all helpful in her care, beyond one of her brothers who did come from four states away when he could. I think a lot of caregiving support often is dependent on the geographic location of one's family too. When I grew up in Cleveland every one of our extended family lived within blocks of us. Now there is not a single relative in the entire metro area and the family is spread, literally, from the East Coast to the West Coast and from Minnesota to Florida. Certainly there is also a huge financial factor in the caregiving equation as well!
I look forward to reading more of your insights into, and questions regarding, caregiving and cultural differences. I find it very interesting! I also wish your Mom all the best in her health as well as sending you and every caregiver...
Strength, courage, and peace!