Meet fellow Caregivers - Introduce yourself

Hi @kepi I am sorry beyond words for all the losses you have suffered. More than most and your strength must be ironclad!

You are right -- caregiving is all about the care and not 'things'. Tough adjustment as we give up more and more, but the inner peace can not only be a source of strength, but refuge as well.

God bless!

Amen to that

Thank you Indiana Scott. This morning is a little better for me, I have to just hold my retorts to my husband. He isn't feeling too sharp either. We will be married 66 years next month. Things just keep going. I'm not feeling to sharp either, Need to have another cat scan to see if any of the cancer has grown. Feel like I'm getting a cold, or something. Being married this long, we sometimes share little barbs with one another. Making spaghetti tonight. Nancy

Yes, each day is different and expect ups and downs. As I've said before, just take one day at a time and enjoy the good times.

@shortshot80 Nancy ... pasta here tonight too 🙂

I am convinced if my wife and I had agreed on everything all the time and not suffered a few slings and arrows we'd have left one another early on!

Thanks for the smile!

Scott

Hi, I have been a caregiver since 2007 for my terminally ill dad who is battling Multiple Myeloma and now under the care of hospice, it has been the hardest years of my life. Now that I'm sick with stage IV CKD severe and many other illnesses I'm unable to give him the care I use to give, does anyone else feel guilty when their unable to continue care for their loved one?

Hi @megwill100
My heart aches for you. I know it is so incredibly difficult.

My mother was dying of Stage lV GBM and I was so busy being caregiver, nurse, doctor and daughter came last. Towards her final days I was not able to care for her in the way she needed. I was finally able to be daughter.

It is ok to ask for help. It gives you time to accept and to be his daughter. Just try to enjoy the time you have now. You are helping him, just in a different way.

Prayers for healing
Dawn

Hello @megwill100 Nice to make your e-acquaintance here! I am so very sorry to hear of your, and your father's, health journeys.

I am Scott and I was my wife's caregiver for 14 years while she fought her battle with brain cancer. It must be very challenging for you to have to manage your care and worry about your dad too.

Caregiving is never an easy 'assignment' and always seems to come with some level of guilt even in the OK times, but when you get in those 'rock and a hard spot' situations the guilt can seem crushing. .

I know of no easy suggestion or answer, but can only say try and keep the guilt in check as you take on your own battles. Take pride in the care you were able to give your dad for so many years and know in your heart it must have made a huge difference to him! Easier said than done, I realize.

As a dad myself I would tell my own child to focus on themselves now...and not to feel guilty in doing so.

Strength and courage to you!

Hi Meg, Unfortunately guilt is an all too common emotion that many caregivers struggle with. I encourage you to share about this in the discussion Scott started. It is aptly named "The Caregivers' Guilt Dumpster - Open for business" http://mayocl.in/2cHbo19

I believe we all care to the best of our ability and yes we feel guilty because we can't continue with the family care giving.. But there is no need to feel guilty because circumstances happen and we are unable to "finish the care giving job we started. No guilt!
shortshot80 / Nancy