Not a joke, but a story. I was on a bike tour a few years ago. I was glamping with a tent and inflatable mattress (which leaked). I use a gravel (road) bike that has tubeless tires; they have a white liquid sealant in case there are punctures. We had a 27 mile rough gravel road to bike, and there were a few crashes and flat tires. Biking can be a hard sport. Once back at camp we discussed the ride over dinner and I said I got two tire punctures but no flats. They quizzed me on how I knew. I replied that I had ejaculate on the tires, and then excused myself because my air mattress was flaccid and needed to be engorged. A fun ride.