Am I selfish getting puppies while I am in remission?

Posted by isadora2021 @isadora2021, Jul 29 8:45pm

For decades my career was my great love. Absolutely had a ball. I always wanted a dog but knew I couldn’t because of the hours I worked away from home - not fair on a furry friend. I always had a dream of getting 2 puppies when I retired. But stage 4 appendix cancer at 58 wasn’t factored in! I worked from home through aggressive treatments and got to NED in May 2022. On 30 June 2023 with my finances all being in order I decided to retire (or as I like to think of it, to go on permanent vacation), It felt absolutely right. It has been absolutely right.

Yet I’ve put off getting my puppies because in a way I’m waiting for a recurrence.

A year later I’ve had enough of that attitude and am about to get 2 Labradoodle puppies. I’m financially able to have them and also deal with my cancer when it does return - hopefully years from now.

Has anyone else gone through a similar struggle with making decisions like this due to cancer? Putting off going overseas?

How did you deal with those decisions?

Thank you ❣️🙏

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Sounds like a lovely idea, definitely get the puppies
All the best x

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@vinnie694

I fully understand where you’re coming from. I have cancelled a few trips in the past. It seems like whenever there is a change in treatment I put off whatever plans we had in fear of the possible side effects. Some days I feel like I shouldn’t plan anything that far ahead, then the mood goes to tomorrow isn’t guaranteed to anyone, whether you are sick or not, so why not! Best wishes on your decisions 🙏

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I feel the same. I get so anxious when I go to my ct scans. At least now they’re bumped to every 12 weeks rather than six.

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I just went on my first overseas trip since 2019 (I was diagnosed with stage 4b oligometastatic prostate cancer in 2021, which initially left me paraplegic from spinal cord compression, though I'm walking again now). I was, frankly, terrified of all the things that could go wrong, including having to waste most of the trip resting in my room, or getting stuck in Europe and running out of meds that are keeping me alive, but in the end the trip went extremely well, and I can't wait to take another one. It was also amazing reconnecting with my work team in Europe. For a couple of weeks, it was almost as if the pandemic and then my cancer hadn't happened.

Best of luck with any trips you all plan!

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Thank you for such practical input. I’ve periodically dropped into dog shelters looking for a Labrador mix and also put my name down and qualified for a Senior Labrador to rehome but haven’t had any luck.

I then did think of fostering and looked through some shelter web sites, but went to “have a look” at this new litter around the corner through a mutual friend. We all know what happens when you have a look!! 🥰

I’m lucky that I did a lot of travelling before I became ill so I’ve not felt deprived not travelling since I became ill and I won’t travel for a while once I’ve got my puppies. I’m ok with that. I met a puppy house sitter who did a terrific job for a friend. My friend complained her dogs barely said hello when she walked into a spotlessly clean house!! I’ve added that to my back up plan if family or friends can’t help when I travel in the next few years.

You’re so right I need to look more into my Will and how to look after my dogs. Thank you for that.

I’m not going to let the fear of recurrence hold me back 😊

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@isadora2021

Thank you for such practical input. I’ve periodically dropped into dog shelters looking for a Labrador mix and also put my name down and qualified for a Senior Labrador to rehome but haven’t had any luck.

I then did think of fostering and looked through some shelter web sites, but went to “have a look” at this new litter around the corner through a mutual friend. We all know what happens when you have a look!! 🥰

I’m lucky that I did a lot of travelling before I became ill so I’ve not felt deprived not travelling since I became ill and I won’t travel for a while once I’ve got my puppies. I’m ok with that. I met a puppy house sitter who did a terrific job for a friend. My friend complained her dogs barely said hello when she walked into a spotlessly clean house!! I’ve added that to my back up plan if family or friends can’t help when I travel in the next few years.

You’re so right I need to look more into my Will and how to look after my dogs. Thank you for that.

I’m not going to let the fear of recurrence hold me back 😊

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Yes, I can understand that. I went on far too many work trips before the pandemic, so I didn't miss them at first either, but now that my cancer is in full (drug-assisted) remission and I can walk again, I find that it's important to me to recapture parts of my life from the "before times."

That said, I love dogs! I'm in the happy situation that my kid and spouse are living with us temporarily, and they're about to bring home a new puppy, so I'm going to have the best of both worlds for a while — all the dog fun without all the responsibility. 🙂

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@northoftheborder

I just went on my first overseas trip since 2019 (I was diagnosed with stage 4b oligometastatic prostate cancer in 2021, which initially left me paraplegic from spinal cord compression, though I'm walking again now). I was, frankly, terrified of all the things that could go wrong, including having to waste most of the trip resting in my room, or getting stuck in Europe and running out of meds that are keeping me alive, but in the end the trip went extremely well, and I can't wait to take another one. It was also amazing reconnecting with my work team in Europe. For a couple of weeks, it was almost as if the pandemic and then my cancer hadn't happened.

Best of luck with any trips you all plan!

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Oh my goodness - that is wonderful and such an excellent example of not letting fear keep you in a box! Very impressive and I’m so glad everything went so well including meeting up with your work team in Europe. No doubt planning helped ensure it did like resting when you needed to. Congratulations and I hope you make that next trip soon 🙏🙌❣️ I’ll start planning my next one too when my babies are older and ready for a doggie house sitter

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@northoftheborder

Yes, I can understand that. I went on far too many work trips before the pandemic, so I didn't miss them at first either, but now that my cancer is in full (drug-assisted) remission and I can walk again, I find that it's important to me to recapture parts of my life from the "before times."

That said, I love dogs! I'm in the happy situation that my kid and spouse are living with us temporarily, and they're about to bring home a new puppy, so I'm going to have the best of both worlds for a while — all the dog fun without all the responsibility. 🙂

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Perfect solution!!

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@mak70

Definitely get the puppies, if you have the energy to keep up with them. Be sure to make a plan in case something happens (cancer or otherwise) but you should not let the cancer control your life.

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Hi! Was in the same position! Had planned to get a dog in 2023 but diagnosis, surgery, chemo and radiation got in the way. Was afraid to move forward but with encouragement from lots of folks (and plan for sister or niece to take over if ever needed) I took the plunge in March and have great standard poodle puppy! Am so glad I have her! Will be honest I still worry about leaving her but the joy she’s brought has helped with stress and worry about a recurrence. Something joyful to focus on. Go fir it and enjoy them!!!

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I vote yes for you getting your dream 2 puppies.😊😊
The love you will give them and the love you will receive from them will be well worth it.
I can not imagine my life without a dog.
My dog helped me so much through my cancer journey.
They still need us no matter what we are going thru so it keeps you going and keeps you busy.
My dog is 7years old. I also have been permenant fostering senior Goldens and Labradors for the last 10 years. My dog helps show them the routine.
A couple of them I was only given 2 months with them before they became ill but those were the best 2 months. I have tears thinking about it.
Some have never been loved or out of a cage because they were breeders. The joy on their face lift me up every day.
My neighbor just got two 8 week old labordoodles they are so cute. She walks them 3 times a day and they are doing great walking with a leash already. I think 2 dogs is
easier they have each other to play with.
Have fun and enjoy you new babies you deserve to fill your dreams.😊😊

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Thank you so much for sharing your experience! I can feel your great love for all of your dogs from here.

You’re amazing to be fostering as you do 🙏 That’s very special. It’s something I’ll bear in mind for when my 2 are old enough to consider.

If I go ahead (which I’m now sure I will do if my CT-PET scans next week are clear) I will get my 8 week old puppies at the end of August. They’re too young right now to have a sick mommy in treatment and if my scans are clear they’ll be 4 months older by the next ones.

Doing research including asking friends about training including walking. Great to know we can start gently over several short walks when they are young.

It’s amazing how much I love them already when I visit and cuddle them and looking forward to building our family. A lot of commitment but made easier with a lot of love ❣️❣️ Thank you!

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