Welcome to Mayo Connect @apdaye, I'm glad you found this support group. Have you had a chance to poke around on here? There is a lot of information that has been shared by people with your same issues. I'd like to introduce you to @irishpeaks. He has a lot of experience with HCM and an ICD, so I hope you will read some of his posts.
I feel your frustration when it seems like you are not being heard and lack information about your condition. Thankfully, it sounds like you are doing the best thing you can which is staying active and learning as much as you can about your condition. You need to be your own best advocate, as sometimes we can fall through the cracks in the healthcare system.
Is your cardiologist familiar with treating HCM? Have you considered a second opinion to be sure you have all the information?