I am so thrilled at the women reaching out and sharing! So many great ideas. The thing to remember is you're not alone! Many have survived and carry on. I am not saying it isn't difficult, but I am saying it IS possible. Try different therapies until you find the one or multiple ones that work for you. I don't carry it so much on my sleeve any longer - nor am I consumed by it or fear. I know praying helps me and being in a prayer group helps me. I do have occasional "triggers" but I do not respond to them the way I used to respond. The horror of incest and abuse is an internal scar you can never get rid of, but it doesn't have to be a gaping wound or a scab that gets yanked off or picked at until infected. It can become a scar that you know is there and you look at sometimes and you are reminded of sometimes, but it doesn't hurt you like it did before. You can tell people about it who ask or need to know about that scar, but you can do so with confidence and without worry about judgment. It CAN happen. My three sisters and I are testament to the same. I do hope your move went well and that you find some resources near you soon. Also, be careful of the groups you look to become involved in. Some bring you down and can get you stuck in what I call "emotional quick sand". You need to know as ugly and painful and hurtful and frighting your experience was and still is to you, you CAN get better and live better and feel better. By the way, I also sleep with a ceiling fan on - it helps me! I also have always had a dog. The presence of a dog helps me feel calmer and safer. I also take medication for depression and to help me sleep. Some people may need medication in addition to talk therapy and other more natural therapies. I, too, am praying for you! You have reached out - that is a wonderful step! Your journey will be unlike anyone else's, but you can use some of the same steps! I pray you feel sunlight today and are warmed by the many people praying for you and encouraging you.