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I have been estranged from my daughter for almost 20 years
Mental Health | Last Active: Mar 9 3:58pm | Replies (38)Comment receiving replies
STRONGLY recommend two books, same author . . . Done With the Crying (1) and Beyond Done With The Crying (2) both written by Sheri McGregor M.A. First book published in 2016, second in 2021. She is a social worker and parent of a child with whom she is estranged. I ordered them from Amazon, paperback editions, and they were not expensive. In addition to giving you a lot of information, there are also activities you can do that will help you better "see" what family patterns were and are for her generation, your generation, her dad's etc.
Also, lots of supportive discussion of next steps, what ifs and ...
Replies to "STRONGLY recommend two books, same author . . . Done With the Crying (1) and Beyond..."
What I think has a lot to do with my one daughter is counselling. I sometimes think some of these so called counselors put thoughts into the person's head and encourage them.
I found it interesting that when I requested a meeting with my daughters counselor in high school AFTER the music teacher incident, she listened but I felt she blew it off like I was out of line bringing this up to her. I also wondered where my daughter got a lot of the stuff in her mind. Wasn't from me.
In fact, she use to accuse me of being prejudiced against a certain group of people. I wasn't, in fact one of my good friends was of that group and she knew it. What was interesting was when her language teacher contacted me about my daughter's behavior towards some of these people. The language teacher was concerned with her attitude etc., because she was a leader and others took her cue!
What daughter was accusing me of is doing what she was doing!
Oh, and when she sued me for money, she also sued me for what she claimed was HER bedroom set. She wanted that too. My lawyer asked if she had paid for it and of course she hadn't. Told her that if she wanted it she could buy it from me as it wasn't hers. Boy, did that get to her! How terrible I was.
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WOW! I guess I never realized others were dealing with this problem. I thought it was just me.
Thank you for the information. I just ordered it.
I read the reviews and want to post part of one that I can so relate to because the time I talked to my daughter she brought up this matter of unconditional love, that no matter what she did as a mother, if I was normal, I would have unconditional love for her.
"“mothers should love unconditionally”, I would suggest that all of these mothers continue to love their children unconditionally, but this doesn’t mean they should tolerate unconditional abuse by their adult children. In most cases, the adult children were disrespectful, even cruel, leading to discard. It is a mother’s nature to react to the cruelty, it is a mother’s nature to tolerate way too much from her adult children, I would suggest that mothers are martyring themselves way too much. "