At what age do you stop driving?

Posted by cathy58 @cathy58, Feb 19 9:46am

I am 65 and since November 2023 I have had some pretty good health issues and have had cataract surgery. My daughter who does not live with me has been driving my car so if I needed to go somewhere her or one of my grandchildren would take me. So now she doesn’t really think I should be driving anymore because now I’m on oxygen. Do I give up driving and sell my car? What would you do?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Aging Well Support Group.

@edsutton

Cathy- It seems a good consult, and perhaps some training sessions with an Occupational Therapist could help you decide what you can reasonably handle. Ask your doctor for a recommendation. Medicare or insurance may pay for this.

Jump to this post

We had an OT eval to determine driving safety for my dad when he was in his 80’s after a light stroke. He did PT and regained strength first. He passed her test! He lived in suburbs and only drove during nonpeak hours to grocery store or a doctor appointment.
His neurologist suggested it and MCare paid, though rules could have changed.

REPLY
@scottrl

If I might ask, what does being on oxygen have to do with it? I keep seeing TV commercials for portable oxygen concentrators, and apparently a big advantage is that they make driving easier.

Anyway, I had to take a break from driving when I had a stroke. That was five years ago.

I slowly regained enough muscle control to be able to drive, but I fatigue quickly, so I don't go very far.

That's kind of a long way of saying that I'll quit driving when I no longer believe I can drive safely.

My condition is different from others, I know. For those who are physically able but challenged by dementia, it's a different story -- they may not be aware that they're a hazard.

Every case is different, and I don't think a specific age plays a role.

Jump to this post

In some states it's illegal if you are using oxygen.

REPLY

I had to quit driving when I got neuropathy in my feet from chemo. I can't feel the pedals. On top of that I live out in the country and can't easily get to anywhere. It's so beautiful I don't want to move into town. My son stays with me several days a week to help me with things and my daughter buys me groceries that he brings out. My health insurance pays for medical visits. There is also a company that will haul seniors around for a small amount. They come all the way out here.
I have a 2017 Toyota with only 23,000 miles that I keep in the garage for an emergency. My son uses it to drive me places like the airport. I keep it because if a flash fire came out here, I'd drive it out of here, numb feet or not.

REPLY

Your daughter is only acting out of caution because she loves you, and because of filial duty. However, it sounds like both of you could use some guidance and education on this topic. There must be a driving school where you and she could visit for some education about gerontology and driving. Or, take her with you to the next visit with your GP.
If you are deemed to be treated successfully with your current regimen of oxygen, then her fear for you and your driving is misguided. Your insurer is the best guide for the risk you are likely to impose on others around you when you drive. If your premiums have shot up, you're deemed to be at high risk. Still, they're willing to foot the bill if you mess up...for some reason. You're still paying premiums, you're still insured. Somebody has this figured out already.
A female philosopher whose name I have forgotten, regrettably, warned humanity to stop buying things that make our lives easier. No, we live better, and longer, when we do much of what we do manually, with trial and tribulation, and when we fight to keep our autonomy, our physical capacity, and to keep our minds active and learning. Driving is probably the one universal indicator of a person's physical and cognitive decline. You live alone, you drive, you go to appointments you have sought and know to keep, you shop for yourself...mostly?.. you do your own banking.....I don't see that you should lose any of that before you WISH to.

REPLY
@pacathy

We had an OT eval to determine driving safety for my dad when he was in his 80’s after a light stroke. He did PT and regained strength first. He passed her test! He lived in suburbs and only drove during nonpeak hours to grocery store or a doctor appointment.
His neurologist suggested it and MCare paid, though rules could have changed.

Jump to this post

if you're talking about Medicare paying for OT & PT, they do cover it. they do for mine.

REPLY

I am 76, drive a 35' motor home towing a car. I do not live in my MH, I just use it for trips, I recently drove 7,000 miles by myself.

Today, age 65 is young, your daughter sounds like a helicopter daughter. Many drive while on oxygen and with other disabilities. My step-father was deaf, he drove until he was 90, my mother drove until she was 93. both were good drivers and decided on their own it was time to give it up.

I would drive as long as you feel you are in control of the vehicle and your reflexes are good.

REPLY
@dollyme

I am 76, drive a 35' motor home towing a car. I do not live in my MH, I just use it for trips, I recently drove 7,000 miles by myself.

Today, age 65 is young, your daughter sounds like a helicopter daughter. Many drive while on oxygen and with other disabilities. My step-father was deaf, he drove until he was 90, my mother drove until she was 93. both were good drivers and decided on their own it was time to give it up.

I would drive as long as you feel you are in control of the vehicle and your reflexes are good.

Jump to this post

Wow I am so glad to have read your comment. That gave me hope that I can continue driving. I don’t go on the interstate because I have panic attacks but feel I’m very comfortable just driving in town. Am going to do some test drives just to make sure I am comfortable with driving since I haven’t drove for at least 4-5 months.
Thank you for the encouragement.

REPLY
@cathy58

Wow I am so glad to have read your comment. That gave me hope that I can continue driving. I don’t go on the interstate because I have panic attacks but feel I’m very comfortable just driving in town. Am going to do some test drives just to make sure I am comfortable with driving since I haven’t drove for at least 4-5 months.
Thank you for the encouragement.

Jump to this post

Yes practice in a parking lot, take the back roads, you've got this!

REPLY

You must be honest with yourself. If you believe that you are endangering anyone’s life, including your own, no one should have to tell you to stop driving.

REPLY
@royburtrum

You must be honest with yourself. If you believe that you are endangering anyone’s life, including your own, no one should have to tell you to stop driving.

Jump to this post

And that goes for days when you feel under the weather, or not-really-yourself. If you cannot react to a sudden situation on the road, nor be able to concentrate clearly, get off the road! Nothing is so important that endangering your life or someone else's would be an issue. Face it, there are times we all should set aside driving or responsible activities like that, for a few days, until we feel better.
Ginger

REPLY
Please sign in or register to post a reply.