Hello @pam753, and welcome to Mayo Connect.
I'm glad you found this support group and are looking for answers. I think I can answer some, if not most of your questions. I had a septal/papillary myectomy at the Mayo Clinic three years ago. The memories are still fresh in my mind!
First, as you already know, no two people are the same, so if I say it was easy breezy, for some it can be terrible. For me, it was not fun, but it certainly wasn't as terrible as I expected and built up in my mind. I was afraid. Naturally. But every day there was progress moving forward and each day got a little better.
Right after?...no fun. No fun at all.
By the time I was ready for discharge I was ready! I wanted a shower in the worst way and couldn't wait for non-hospital food. Even though my taster was off for several weeks.
You will most likely be advised to NOT use your arms for much more than lifting a coffee cup for sometime. Your sternum needs to heel, like any broken bone. This is super important to keep your sternum resting. Bad things happen if you don't listen!
I went to TJ Maxx and got some lounge/sport bras that I could step into and pull on. You cannot reach around to put them on. And you don't want anything like underwire touching your incision. You will be naturally protective of that!
It was summer, so I got linen pants with stretch waist bands to pull on. Anything you can pull up is better, as you are rather swollen after surgery for a couple of weeks. (Fluid from surgery/IV/Etc)
Slip on shoes is very helpful as well. You will not want to bend over to put shoes on.
Another helpful tip but not totally necessary, though others may disagree: a recliner. It's helpful afterwards. My guy bought me an electric one, and I did use it. But I could have done okay without one too. It's just really hard getting in or out of anything at first. Bed, car, chair, toilet, especially when you can't use your arms to pull yourself up.
You can, and are encouraged to shower every day. The Mayo wanted me to use a fresh washcloth on the sternum daily and use only liquid soap. I got Dr. Bronner's peppermint soap and a 10-pack of soft wash cloths.
Walking is super important, listening to your body is too. You'll need to be walking everyday, but don't over do it. I walked six miles everyday before surgery...so it was hard to keep me down. I was so grateful to be driven to the trail I walked and do a half a mile. Oh, yeah...you can't drive for a month. It's maddening!
I hope this helps...I've gone on quite a bit. If you have ANY more questions, PLEASE feel free to reach back. I'll be here and I will put you in my prayers for February 9.