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I feel the same as you..I am 52 and I have struggled with depression for years and years…I feel restless, bored..and I can't think of one thing that I actually enjoy anymore…I like to plan trips so I have something to look forward to but clearly I can't afford to do that..its a real struggle for sure…My husband took his life in 2011 and we were married for 26 years…he never displayed depression to me and I was very in tuned..yet I have struggled with it for years…not so much that I wan't to die as it is I am tired of the struggle..
I was also given Paxil and Trazadone but like you said I felt drugged and not feeling better till around 1 pm..so I stopped taking it..I haven't attempted the Paxil yet…I did find out that my thyroid was on the low side I have started taking the RX for that and honestly my mood feels much better! Have your TSH checked?
Thank you for the words of encouragement JW2. I was given the set from the Midwest center, they had a lot of good things to say and offer I wish I could just go somewhere and get that type of intense help in person, give me like a few weeks! I am suffering severely right now with depression, it just seems really heavy right now, not sure if its due to feeling such guilt over my husband’s suicide in March of this year. Its hurting me to see my kids hurt too…..I am trying to take college classes after being out of school for 25 years, I need to get a job that is going to support me, but I also have fibromaylgia something I have had for almost 18 years. This is why I didn’t work, I just cant handle the stress. I want to work! But I think the fibro has settled in my back or something because that is the source of my pain, along with all my aching muscles. I just started a new medication called Savella, I have a hard time taking meds just because I worry about what they are doing to my body. I take Zanax as well, and it helps me. I have heard to many horror stories about antidepressants… like you said you try something and it works for a while then it seems the body gets used to it and you have to either go up in dose or switch, then start all over with side effects. I know it does affect the brain, I see how it affects me. And I know it effected my husbands brain. That is why they have warnings on the medications.
I want to be happy, and joyful…….I want to succeed in life……….things just seem so heavy. And I am tired.
HI Hopeful, I appreciate your thoughts…..the problem for me is that I have suffered with depression for as long as I can remember. My husband was dealing with a short term depression due to circumstances and he was put on anti depressents and he killed himself 2 months later. He was not a person that would ever do anything like that. Well liked by so many people, a leader at work, a strong person who was always into working out, eating right………that scares me to know that those medications did something to his thinking. 🙁