This is a big topic. Caring for the SELF and holding our SELF in esteem is the work of a lifetime. That's my conclusion in my personal experience.
How to do that? Very challenging and complex question. And the answers differ with each unique individual. For me, at least, the first step is accepting ME the way I really am, without judgment. On the days that I can do this, I feel empowered. And what others say to me, or "expect " of me, doesn't matter one bit. I have been practicing "being me " without judgement, for so many years. It works as long as I work it.