What caused my cancer?

Hi Cindy, that is quite the graph! You've been told you were not genetically predisposed, but that is based on what they know today. In 5-10 years, they may identify another genetic mutation that explains your cancer. Always good to research and incorporate even more healthy habits, but try not to blame yourself for something unknown. It sounds like you did everything right. My brother that died from lung cancer at 48 was thin, fit, never smoked, never drank, took no meds not even OTC. After horrific back pain that started at the gym, he was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer at 45. It was shocking. He survived 3 more years only because he was so young and healthy otherwise. They hadn't identified a genetic mutation for him, but given all the different cancers in our family and at young ages, I think his had to be a genetic predisposition that just hasn't been identified yet. I have both BRCA2 and CHEK2 cancer mutations. When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer at 54, I asked, "Why not me?" My question was why did my very healthy brothers die young from their cancers, but I survived when I'm the one that had all the quirky medical issues my whole life? Survivor's guilt, I guess. Even now, at 64, with two different cancers -- recurrent advanced breast cancer and 50+ neuroendocrine carcinoids in both lungs, I'm still here and still able to enjoy life. Pretty lucky, I guess. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and the graph.

I agree that most of us have asked this question at different times in our journey. @cmdw2600 I am sorry you have joined the club none of us ever wanted to join.
When I was diagnosed young, before menopause or my first mammogram. I asked this question. I was told at the time since I was negative for BRCA and all the cancer came on my dads side, it wasn’t genetics.
Then there was the usual things that blame the patient, I might have had a drink or two in my twenties. I might not have exercised enough, or the 5% body fat I sported at the time, much higher today😂😂.
That graph shows how much we know today about the possible reasons, and it is huge compared to 2004. I would speculate that in another 20 years we will know so much more about breast cancer and why we get it, or maybe we won’t get it anymore.
I put this into perspective for myself by saying, I will be grateful for whatever time I am given by the knowledge we have today, and offer my journey as a learning tool to add to that knowledge base, for future prevention.
I am intensely curious, may I genuinely ask if knowing all the reasons you might have gotten it, enriches your life? Can you explain this to me? 💕

Basically I regard my cancer simply as a bi-product of having been born in a human body. Every person on earth will fall ill and die. Mutation causes cancer but it also makes biological life possible. I think ordinary good health habits are important so that we feel ok and show positive care of our bodies and self respect. I just use common sense and keep away from extremes in health habits. There are absolutely no co-factors in my very rare NET except for possibly age, over which I have no control! That said, I do believe in industrial safety and controls, and things like not exposing civilians to nuclear testing.
One thing we CAN all control--not blaming ourselves or others. No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. Friendliness and compassion are a good way to go--towards ourselves and others.

You have a wonderful attitude considering all that you and your loved ones have been through (and are still experiencing).

I agree with you that genetic testing continues to advance. Four years ago I believe I was tested for 27 genes-all that were known to contribute to cancer at that time. Who knows how many there are now.

Best wishes to you and your loved ones, Cindy

You are correct about blame. Early on it became clear that my wonderful team of doctors did not want me to wonder what I did to myself to make the cancer manifest itself.

Kindness and compassion is key, as you say, and I feel this in abundance on this site. Thank you!

Cindy

To answer the question-knowing the reason(s) wouldn’t enrich my life and the past cannot be changed, but if it is something I can control and not repeat a mistake, I would like to know.

For example, I took the heavy duty birth control pills for ten years. This began in the seventies and lasted into the eighties. I’m not saying it was that by any means and if it was, that’s in the past. Just an example. But I have enjoyed wine with my dinner all of my adult life and if it was that, I can change my habits going forward. (Alcohol is not so much a contributor to triple negative as some other BC but again, I can influence this factor now and in the future.) Again, just an example.

I don’t think about it so much anymore-not like in the beginning. Just try to do my best and like you, be helpful to others by adding to the knowledge base.

Thank you for your reply! Cindy

I liked the graph, but I'm sorry it made me dizzy following all those lines. I looked at the CDC - "what are risk factors for breast cancer". For the Risk Factors you cannot change - I'm older (dx at 68); genetic mutation (BRCA2+); have dense breasts; family history of ovarian cancer (me at early 30's - caught very early; had surgery and two kids). Of the 8 cannot change items I have 4 - I stopped worrying about why/how I got cancer. Of the Factors I could change - 2 were in the past; only ones I can change are getting more active and losing some more weight - I'm not obese but I could benefit from losing about 10-15 lbs.

But you're right in the beginning I wondered what I did that caused this; if there were habits I could have had that would have prevented the mutated gene becoming active to allow cancer to start growing. Maybe if I didn't eat ANY sweets; maybe if I was vegan; how about if I did intermittent fasting. Some of these are habits I would have had to have most of my life to maybe have an impact on the mutated gene that growing up we didn't even know about. We still don't know what preventative measures we can take to prevent these mutated genes doing what they do. Time and research will hopefully have that information for those we may have passed that gene to - (1) not knowing that we had it; (2) realizing after the fact that we have passed it to our children (son BRCA2+; daughter BRCA-). I sometimes feel guilty that I unknowing passed that gene to my child - what would I have done different had I known.

You cannot feel guilty for what you never knew. You only know what you know as they say. I believe we all do the best we can with what we know.
I also am a firm believer in moderation, maybe wrongly, but I don’t think a life of the occasional glass of wine or sweet kills anyone.
I do hope there is a day when women don’t get breast cancer, but I don’t believe feeling bad about ourselves is ever helpful.
Has your daughter been tested for BRCA genes?

Thank you for your comments - I too am a firm believe in moderation. I love food and flavors; I've learned to really use more spices and less salt and sugar to flavor food. But you're right I shouldn't feel guilty for what I didn't know and there is nothing I can do about it now.

My son was tested and is BRCA2+; my daughter was also tested and is NOT BRCA+. Both my children have children which means my son could have unknowing passed on the mutated gene. Hopefully with time and research we'll know what might trigger the activation of the mutation so we can modify our lifestyle to minimize the risk.

I've advised my siblings to also get tested, especially my sibling that has children. She has been tested and is awaiting results. The others have been advised - which is all I can do for them.

Hi @bpknitter53 -- I'm glad you brought up decisions about genetics. I'm sad my son inherited BRCA2+ from me, but I don't feel guilty. I didn't know. He doesn't blame me. I don't blame my parents who didn't know. I'm glad I was born regardless.

IMPORTANT: For anyone BRCA2+, their spouse needs to be tested for BRCA2 before having children because if both parents pass that mutation onto their child (25% chance) it creates a much more serious rare disease called Fanconi anemia. That's a different ballgame. Luckily, only about 1 in 500 people are BRCA2+ so it's unlikely that both parents will have it. Hopefully, they told you about that when reviewing your genetic findings.