Change jobs: Should I or shouldn't I??

It sounds like your manager is definitely a problem and it’s not an easy situation. If you want to try and get some resolution with this problem perhaps you can have a private conversation with her and see what is going on and how can you help to improve your relationship with her, if her feelings for you are personal then you have a problem of another kind i.e., she could be jealous of your talents in the job and she feels threatened. I guess you don’t have anyone else to turn to for help within the company. I would say that based on what you have mentioned it might be a good idea to ask yourself if this job is really worth the stress it’s causing you, I hope you’re able to find your place where you are appreciated and don’t give up but fight back for what you want, no one has the right to stop you from what you want to achieve, good luck.

It seems there is almost always interpersonal stress in the workplace.
How much is acceptable? How much is unhealthy?
For most people work time is a large part of lifetime. It should be something more than daily misery for a paycheck.
Since this sounds like a big decision for you, perhaps you could discuss it with a life coach or therapist. Talking through something like this can help you "get all the card out on the table" and make a well-balanced decision.
Good luck, and let us know what happens.

@ruc38 This is a tough one that I've also faced in the workplace. Here are a few things that I considered at the time and might be helpful to you.

Was the manager already in this position when you came to the agency 3 years ago? Is there a possibility that your manager will retire anytime soon, move to another position or to another agency? Do you have any inkling that your manager is trying to get you to resign by ignoring the good ratings you get from your patients and "cherry picking" only the few negative ones. By doing this do you think she might be trying to get you to leave the agency?

In my case there were two layers of managers who were intent on trying to get me to resign. It was a power play and really had nothing to do with me but it made me miserable. I was in the way. I did start looking for another position however both of these managers retired and left the workplace within a few years after all of this began. I'm retired now and their behavior stuck with me all the years I remained working and still bothers me now. I was the same age as you when all of this happened.

You could start looking for another position. It gives you options in your life. I looked for other positions and nothing came about at the time. Had I received a good offer at the time I would have taken it and left. But that's me.

I agree with @edsutton that talking with a life coach or therapist could help you to deal with the stress and decide what you'd like to do. If your agency as an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) you could book a few sessions and the bonus is you won't have to pay for the sessions. These sessions are meant to be confidential, short-term counseling, and confidential.

What do you think you might do next?

Many, many people have problems with abusive bosses.

There are books, articles and videos about these problems.

If you are finding yourself in this kind of situation, I would definitely think about leaving.

If you want, never a bad idea to take some counseling with a professional therapist. Go over the issues. Brainstorm a bit.

Very sorry about the problems.

I know many people who have been the victim of abusive bosses.

take care now.

If she waited 6 months to tell you then that would mean it was not important and now the facts have become blurred. Dont worry about it just enjoy working with your clients

I'm sorry you are dealing with this stress. It seems that you take great pride in your service to others and it's hard to have only negative comments spoken instead of supporting your hard work . I believe it's important to call out the positive and the things that needs addressing, but in a timely manner. Serving others may always lead to a complaint around what a client feels they need differently. You are probably not used to having redirection because you have such a good work ethic and service ideals. That can cause you to take redirection very personally, in my experience.

I'm wondering, if this has nothing to do with you , but perhaps your manager was called out for not discussing the complaint with you, in a timely manner, and now she's on notice for not addressing her job correctly. That puts her at odds with you because she's in a bad place.
I would spend time reflecting on the positives and negatives of the position . If you feel you want a new agency, don't leave the job until you have a new offer. Much easier to get a new position while working. If you leave because of a disagreement with leadership, when asked why you left a long term position... it can be difficult to present that well, to a new manager looking to hire.
You have lots of good advice for other posters! Hope things improve!

I’ll start by saying I’m 80, retired, and out of the market. So take my word and all others with a grain of salt. There’s a brave “new” world out there and a place for you in it. You may be in the right place and you may not. You have been given a lot of opinions and I agree that with most of them.
Let me add my last words,
“ When you find the courage to look up HE will give you the strength to carry on”!
God bless you.

Thank you for your response. I'd be happy to work one on one in a homebased setting doing private duty. I think I'll start advertising my services online and possibly mail postcards out to senior communities.

I am also retired and perhaps not “in the know” anymore.
I will say this, when we hired independent caretakers for my husband’s parents we always received better quality care, than from an agency. Also, we paid them well, and it all went to them, not some organization. If you feel you have enough contacts to go it alone, you may be happier.

There are many jobs in this area of home care workers. I did work in home health and I had to work for different companies over a few years to get a certain amount of comfort .
I advocated for my clients too much and ruffled some managers. But also the clients would depend on me and management never cared for what you did. It was hard to be everything to everybody. you have to be true to yourself to be able to get the job done for others. My last job was 2 years of being his concierge for his needs. And a very happy working environment.Finally retired. Now 70 .