Optimism Versus Pessimism

Scott, that was great! That was the first video I have seen of you. You are quite talented and obviously working very hard.

I like the post above as well. It makes me grateful for what I do have when I consider those who have it much worse than I do. There are many types of loss, illness and pain in this world.

Thanks for sharing. I’ll look forward to seeing more of you.

Thank you! Tell your friends...

By the way, you made me realize I initially posted the wrong link! (It's been fixed now.)

Thanks, Scott. That's a good example. I tend to the positive side, e.g. "I'm so lucky that I live in a rich country where I get excellent medical care and the latest treatments" rather than "It's so unfair that this happened to me" (though I wouldn't be human if I didn't indulge in the second one sometimes).

That said, I learned through CBT (Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy) that the ideal goal isn't optimism or pessimism but realism, because it's the most sustainable:

The optimist says that the glass is half full.

The pessimist says that the glass is half empty.

The realist acknowledges that they'll need to refill the glass soon, but also that they have enough water in it for right now.

Scott - Sometimes we get to have a little laugh too. Tuesday was absolutely dreadful where I live (and in much of the USA), but I had a dentist appointment to go to. It can be hard to be optimistic when you use a walker and can’t carry an umbrella in a torrential downpour. The plus side? Having a handicapped spot right in front of the door so I was able to get out, grab my walker quickly, and roll in without getting very wet. The laugh I got, at somebody else’s expense, was watching an able man in the parking lot open his handy umbrella and the 40mph wind take that thing and blow it inside out while he stayed clinging to it for dear life and getting soaked. He came in the office soaking wet with the damaged umbrella and threw it in the trash. So, sometimes umbrellas are overrated (though it’s not wise to use one in big wind storms) 😁

Hi northoftheborder,
I agree completely.
Toxic positivity can be just as bad as pessimism.
(And equally annoying to the realist.)

I journal and doodle every day...one section of it is Gratitude. It helps to take eradicate the pessimism by thinking of all the simple, wonderful things I have (example: a warm home on a -9 degree day) and writing them down and reflecting on those things. 🙂

Last week as I was wrapping up my consultation with my Endocrinologist, she asked if there was anything else she could help me with and wished me a Happy Belated Birthday! I appreciated that. I had already gone over all my issues, even though some weren’t in her specialty. (She was quite helpful and caring.) I instinctively said she had helped me and I was grateful for that and every one of those birthdays. They used to bother me after 50, but not now! I am grateful for every day I’m able to function, breathe, walk, see…..enjoy a glass of wine. I feel very fortunate. There’s plenty of time for realism later on. Lol

I love your positivity!

Thank you for this comment. I appreciate a positive attitude, and am typically a glass half full type of person. However, I found myself resenting the directive to stay positive from so many people, in regards to my cancer journey. I found it to be unhelpful, & added pressure that I didn’t need. There are not only two options, but I couldn’t name what I was feeling. Thank you for doing that for me; realist. I am thankful for the great medical team I have, my supportive family & friends. At the same time, I am sad for the things I have lost, the daily struggles, pain, & sometimes that gets me down. Realistic seems to be the healthiest option.

I can totally relate to your reply! I am generally a rather positive person. At least not a card carrying negative person. But when it comes to telling me how to view MY world, that is for me to decide. And I do view/experience my world one way and express how I am feeling about it to others differently.
I am constantly in a lot of pain so it would be an uncomfortable conversation if you asked, “How are you?”, and I actually told you how I was. So of course things are “okay, a good day, not too bad today”
Realistic seems like the best operational word for me too.