Newly a caregiver for my spouse with stage 4 colorectal cancer

Hi I am a new caregiver of my husband of 15yrs with stage 4 colon cancer with Mets to his liver and lungs. We have 2 kids and we are in our late 40’s. My world has been completely turned upside down from a family of 4 that did everything together to me and the kids spending time alone while my husband is sick in bed and weak. He has had his colon resection, port placed and 3 hospitalizations in 6 weeks. He will hopefully start his chemo journey next week. I am so worried and scared for our future. It’s so hard to see him physically changing and not being present with us. My kids are 14 and 12, they don’t understand how sick he is. I don’t know what is going to happen. I fear for his life every time I lay next to him but my anxiety and emotions are so high right now. I fear I am not doing enough to get him the care he needs. I don’t feel supported by our doctor and nurse. I have had to research a lot of things myself. Anyone have any advice or hope that can somehow help me feel like I don’t have a black cloud over me. The next 6 mos are going to be a big change for us.