Fall and long Term Memory Loss

Hi. @cayupe1. Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. Really sorry to hear about your wife's fall. That is a lot of lost memories.

How is your wife responding to you?

I imagine the neurologist ran EEG, MRI, and other tests to determine the area(s) of her brain that were affected. If so, it would be good to get some detailed info from them on the results. The MRI will show bruising, bleeding, and other and the EEG can find anomalous processing (slow or fast wavelengths). If she has complete amnesia that continues, then specialists need to be found. Recovery for me was like a stair, with two steps up and one back as things were found then lost again, then found. At 1.5 weeks, rest and destressing are important. As your wife heals, consider doing things to escape such as books and movies, and to trigger memories. Talking about old days, meeting with friends, and travels all help to rewire.

My moderate TBI was from falls 31 years ago with minor damage to my right occipital, and moderate to my left temporal (finding words and numbers) and basal frontal (emotions, smell and taste) lobes. The brain heals, but it is a maddeningly slow process, and 1.5 weeks is very early in the recovery. It is very difficult emotionally as well, all of a sudden you are different; the feeling of being lost that continues as memories are found. What is still missing? It is handy to keep a diary of the recovery steps.

Kay, Thank you sooo much. MRI looked good they said. The EEG showed slow waves.
She does not like pictures as she gets frustrated she does not know the people.
Her speech today is much more fluid and day to day processing much imporved.
I want her to see a post hospital Neurologist but they are saying the MRI is normal.
She sleeps about 3/4 of the day.
I will start talking about memories. I know everyone is different but when did you start getting some of the past memories back.
She functionary cant figure things out. "Matt why when I walk in to some rooms the lights turn on and other do not". We have motion sensors in some rooms

Doctors sometimes rely on tests too much over other evidence. When my left temporal lobe EEG was slow, a month or so after my fall, it felt like words had to wade through mud to get to my mouth. I tried to destress by giving my brain jobs...find the word and get back to me. Sleeping a lot is normal; the brain is damaged and gets tired easily. Emotions can be all over the place because barriers are down. Negative comments can feel like gut punches. Meditation, exercise, walks, and other activities can lessen the stress. Consider watching movies she liked, they can jog memories (don't mention she has seen them before) and try cueing her with names to link to the pictures. For me, it was a bit like reverse dementia, finding my way back to who I was. Strange as it may sound, there were some improvements from the accident. I'm still a logical scientist, but am a bit more emotionally open now (less geeky). It is great that you are there for your wife. Most of my recovery was done in 1 year, but the final bits took about 8 years. These were getting to 100% in driving, a surprising complex endeavor, and being able to taste beef. I could taste chicken after several month, which feeds into the "everything tastes like chicken" theory.

Sorry about your wife's fall. Brain injuries are very hard for many doctors to diagnose, and most importantly, understand. She needs time and rest to even start to recover. There is no much thing as how much time it takes to recover. Recovery is a life-time process. Your wife will get better, but don't guide her process by hours/days/weeks/months. Let her heal as good as she can, as fast as SHE can. Believe in her. I fell from a ladder, and it took me months before I could even begin to think I felt ok. I did occupational and speech therapy for a year and it was so necessary. Therapy could help her as well. Therapists understand and more helpful then any doctor. The phrase "see one brain injury and you have seen one brain injury" is the key. Believe in her, don't act like she's a little kid, answer her questions honestly, help her when she asks for help, but only if she asks. Her brain is rewiring itself, and that takes a lot of time and energy.

Dear @cayupe1

xxx YOUR WIFE? xxx
Falling down is a dozen ways of “falling down”… some people hit - badly - and loss way more than others. Your wife is better and getting back of her brain.

xxx ME? xxx
Me? My memory has lost my memory - like Christmas when my kids where young or my great job working in my city… and what more — I’ve lost 80% of my ability and I can’t get it back.

Thx,
Greg D. @greg1956

PS: I had a bicycle accident, 12 years ago. I am a TBI memory person to learn as well I can.

@cayupe1 Glad you're here. Sorry to hear of your wife's accident. My son had a severe traumatic brain injury and had retro-amnesia; he lost nine months of memories. It will take patience and time; other survivors have recovered part or all of their long-term memories. Try to stay in the moment and make each minute as beautiful as possible. When she doesn't remember someone or something, say, "Well, we will have to make new memories. Let's think of something fun we'd like to do with..."

AND, play music. Music she loves. New music. Allow people to share their love of music. Art of any variety is amazingly powerful and music holds a special key to our memory.

I encourage you to find a brain injury caregiver support group or another spouse or two who are caregivers; sharing the journey is incredibly helpful. Come back here as often as you like. You are a wonderful spouse!

Thank you all. This is so much more helpful then the reg doctors all guessing. I have asked for a Neurologist asap but think they will just say, "this is rare"