Emotional aftermath following breast cancer treatment

Thank you, this article is perfect. I am currently in the middle of chemo for my 2nd round of cancer (did not have to have it the first time, only (only!) a mastectomy and radiation) and I'm having a hard time with it. I'm saving it so I can pass it on when I feel up to it.
Thanks again.

In addition to my husband, who has been very empathetic and encouraging, almost all of my friends at the gym are guys, but a couple I've shared my bad news with, including the owner of the gym, have been encouraging as well. Oddly, the few female friends I usually chat with are sympathetic to a degree but seem like they don't want to talk about it.

I'm wondering if anyone here can advise me on how to scout out a counselor who might be helpful. Where should I begin my search?

My emotions have been all over also. I had so many shocks, or surprises as I went through the phases of diagnosis and finding it aggressive enough for chemo. Didn't start out that way. The AI drugs, I think, have an emotional effect on me too. I have very recently confided with a trusted friend and have talked with a psychologist. I plan to continue with that for a while. I felt better after the counselor visit. You aren't alone. Don't hesitate to reach out for some help.

@lznielsen, fellow members have written about PTSD and cancer in these related discussions too:

- PTSD and learning to cope living with cancer https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/ptsd-learning-to-cope/
- Facing Cancer Recurrence, PTSD & Acknowledging Mental Health https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/facing-cancer-recurrence-ptsd-acknowledging-mental-health/
- Likely metastatic lobular cancer: How do you deal with fear, PTSD? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/most-likely-mbc-ilc/

I believe grief and gratitude can co-exist. I'm glad you're here to share your experience.

P.S. I went for my post op diognostic mammo and blood work. Had my surgery in Sept. Everything looks good. All clear. I'm going to believe it stays that way.

Hi @rosa1935 - Similar to you, I have experienced a wide range of emotions during breast cancer diagnosis and treatment.

I definitely grieved. Also, I found it emotionally and mentally challenging to make such important medical decisions so quickly and also accept that my life and health had changed so profoundly.

Most helpful was an oncology social worker who was part of the hospital system where I was treated. We did telehealth almost every week.

And, I was inspired by the women on this site. Also my local Gilda’s Club offered helpful webinars.

Be kind to yourself. I also realized that accepting my feelings was easier than fighting against them. I journaled every day. I use the Waking Up app for meditation, which helped ground me.

(Antidepressants were also helpful!) All hands on deck for help!

Best wishes! You are not alone.

There is no answer to your question, I’m afraid. I found my lump March 2021 and 4 years on I can still get emotional even when I see other people with cancer, never mind myself. I’m due , 12 May for my 4th mammogram after breast cancer and I feel sick just thinking about it. Like you, on the outside, I’m feeling and look ok so my family think I’m ok. But inside, I’m not ok. But I am better than I was. I had counselling from July 22 - oct 22 and this was a game changer for me. I was becoming isolated and was suffering badly from panic attacks. I still get these attacks but I can control them now. Xx

I just reached out to a counselor I have known for many years. One hour long phone visit helped and I will continue on with him to find ways to cope better. I am weepy a lot, so tired, and don't have any family near. I got to the point that I felt my friends didn't particularly want to hear anything else about this journey of mine with breast cancer. I was given Anastrozole after chemo, with side effects. Switched to exesmestane. Yes, side effects but less so. I don't feel normal. Other health challenges have crept in too. Aging stuff. (I am grateful for so much though.) The drugs can affect mood so I suggest finding someone with whom you are comfortable to have a talk to pour out your feelings. Friend or counselor. I hope those of you checking into Bustedtank can find something that you like. I am almost 85, shrunk to 4'11" and have lost my waist. Therefore bras with a band just roll up and are uncomfortable. They also ride up too high under the front part of the armpit and rub and annoy terribly. There was a hint posted to sew down the armpit area. I had a single mastectomy. The search for bras in still on!

Wow! I am SO glad I am on Mayo Connect and learning from all you women!
May 12, 2025 is my bilateral mastectomy. Because of many other health issues, including heart disease I will not be having implants done. Cancer caught early, Thank God, but in both breasts...& I am high risk for a reoccurrence so off with both breasts. Of course, I am mourning the loss of my breasts. I was shocked to learn I had BC...always so focused on my heart health. When I saw pictures of women who went "flat" I was initially shocked! I feel better now but I am wondering how I will feel emotionally post surgery & I look in the mirror. My goodness...how could you not feel hit by a ton of bricks?? Yes, the cancer is gone (pray so). My surgeon told me in 2-3 yrs. my stage 0-1 would metastasize...I was thinking a DMX was overkill but she set me straight. 4 lumpectomies were not reasonable & PLUS b/c of my heart disease I could not take the chance of scar tissue from radiation affecting my heart. My heart is already damaged. I am 70 years old, with total support from my husband, son and friends. I have so much to be grateful for. Thanks ssmab for that heads up re: prosthetics, I will look into bustedtank.com. Health & Peace to All!!

I also had a huge hematoma. I felt horrible. It took a very long time for it to go away. I think depression and sadness goes along with it all. Your body goes through a huge change. Be kind to yourself. Honestly, I think the only way I got through it was because of my husband and friends. They were like my cheerleaders. My surgery was in 2023. My risk of getting breast cancer again is high. Do you have a very good friend to talk to?