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Anyone have a bi-polar dx with thyroid cancer and struggling?
I'm 60, male, had thyroid cancer at 25 and was dx'd bi-polar a few days after my radiation treatment because I had an extreme psychosis which I'd never had before. Prior to that I had significant depression periods around age 20 and some periods hypomania. I had several psychoses post dx all precipitated by sleep deprivation, but none for the past 10+ years since I learned to protect my sleep. But the depression! - therapy has done nothing, no meds have worked. I've taken Lamotrigine for 15 years just because, not sure it's doing anything. Now my TSH and T4 are high and I'm in major depression. Waking after 2-3 hours of sleep. It's hell and I'm at the end of my rope. Someone please tell me they found a way to cope with a similar history! Any MD's who have expertise in thyroid and psychiatry? My mind NEVER stops racing, can't concentrate, memory is worsening, confidence and self esteem are all "masked" to keep up the appearance of being OK. I'm not.
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@jtstorm, that must've been a lot to handle at age 25 to be diagnosed with cancer and then experience extreme psychosis and find you were dealing with bi-polar too. You managed well. Now you find yourself facing the hellish times again. Have you considered requesting an appointment at Mayo Clinic? Or a large medical center?
I am so sorry you are going through this. I believe there is a way to reduce your suffering. If therapy did not work, perhaps it was the wrong person/process. If meds did not help, again wrong solution. Don't give up. If you live near mayo then ask for help. If not, try a different provider. When a solution doesn't work, don't assume it's YOU. It's not YOUR FAULT that you have not gotten help yet. But you do need to keep trying. The Mayo Clinic does have a team that specializes in BPD.
While you are on this journey...simplify your life. Remove as many triggers of stress as you can.
Take care.
I've thought about Mayo but I live in Denver and feel like my family with further alienate me if I insist on a visit there costing potentially thousands of dollars and nothing changes because they found nothing new. Do they do phone consults? Seems maybe the best way to get started might be to provide a concise written history that a specialist would read then do a phone/video consult follow-up.
Thanks. A long time ago I concluded I was unencouragable because I believe I've tried everything "reasonable": multiple psychiatrists, therapists and every medication available, even neurological testing (not imaging) with now new answers and little to no effect. I think my life is relatively simple. Currently not working and not sure I can; employment history is embarrassing. So I isolate a lot. Wife works a lot. Only daughter is in college out of state, independent and emotionally distant from me. My father passed away last Sept (stroke, dementia) we were not very close due to religious differences, and my relationship with my mother is not good, long story of recently revealed family secrets. She's in an assisted living near me, hypochondriac and completely self absorbed in her arthritic pain and bowel issues (which I also have - bowel, no considerable pain yet). She literally drives me mad. I hope the craziness is not genetic as I see myself with some of her crazy tendencies and am fighting like mad to keep myself from becoming like her by distancing myself from her as much as I can but still being a "good son". I'm not. I could go on and on. The only way to remove triggers is isolate and yes, I know that is unhealthy. I feel like I can't feel joy and don't remember what it was like to feel it if I ever even have. I've pretty much resigned to a belief that whatever treatment plan could or would work for me will not be known in my lifetime. If it is all psychiatric (distorted thinking/beliefs) I don't see an end and not sure how much hope I have left, if any.
Have you read, The Noonday Demon, by Andrew Solomon. It is very good. Your issues are more complex but the book is very good.
My personal experience with D is twofold: remove/avoid stressor and second find a daily activity that is mentally intense. The daily activity/hobby/work needs Your mind, and it does not leave room for ruminating.