Anyone have a bi-polar dx with thyroid cancer and struggling?

@jtstorm, that must've been a lot to handle at age 25 to be diagnosed with cancer and then experience extreme psychosis and find you were dealing with bi-polar too. You managed well. Now you find yourself facing the hellish times again. Have you considered requesting an appointment at Mayo Clinic? Or a large medical center?

I am so sorry you are going through this. I believe there is a way to reduce your suffering. If therapy did not work, perhaps it was the wrong person/process. If meds did not help, again wrong solution. Don't give up. If you live near mayo then ask for help. If not, try a different provider. When a solution doesn't work, don't assume it's YOU. It's not YOUR FAULT that you have not gotten help yet. But you do need to keep trying. The Mayo Clinic does have a team that specializes in BPD.
While you are on this journey...simplify your life. Remove as many triggers of stress as you can.
Take care.

I've thought about Mayo but I live in Denver and feel like my family with further alienate me if I insist on a visit there costing potentially thousands of dollars and nothing changes because they found nothing new. Do they do phone consults? Seems maybe the best way to get started might be to provide a concise written history that a specialist would read then do a phone/video consult follow-up.

Thanks. A long time ago I concluded I was unencouragable because I believe I've tried everything "reasonable": multiple psychiatrists, therapists and every medication available, even neurological testing (not imaging) with now new answers and little to no effect. I think my life is relatively simple. Currently not working and not sure I can; employment history is embarrassing. So I isolate a lot. Wife works a lot. Only daughter is in college out of state, independent and emotionally distant from me. My father passed away last Sept (stroke, dementia) we were not very close due to religious differences, and my relationship with my mother is not good, long story of recently revealed family secrets. She's in an assisted living near me, hypochondriac and completely self absorbed in her arthritic pain and bowel issues (which I also have - bowel, no considerable pain yet). She literally drives me mad. I hope the craziness is not genetic as I see myself with some of her crazy tendencies and am fighting like mad to keep myself from becoming like her by distancing myself from her as much as I can but still being a "good son". I'm not. I could go on and on. The only way to remove triggers is isolate and yes, I know that is unhealthy. I feel like I can't feel joy and don't remember what it was like to feel it if I ever even have. I've pretty much resigned to a belief that whatever treatment plan could or would work for me will not be known in my lifetime. If it is all psychiatric (distorted thinking/beliefs) I don't see an end and not sure how much hope I have left, if any.

Have you read, The Noonday Demon, by Andrew Solomon. It is very good. Your issues are more complex but the book is very good.
My personal experience with D is twofold: remove/avoid stressor and second find a daily activity that is mentally intense. The daily activity/hobby/work needs Your mind, and it does not leave room for ruminating.

As I look into the window of internal hell you described as your world I can relate to some of your torment. I suffer from some of that outlook and resulting mental torture, but not nearly to the extent and depth you describe. Although I have good reason to be negative ( in a short period of time I have ben diagnosed with heart problems, chronic numbness- pain and now cancer after being extremely healthy for years). Yet others have it much worse and still have the joy of living, which I am now trying to reclaim although gloominess seems to be my default. My pain management prescribed Lyrica for my numbness which worked, quickly reducing the intensity of the numbness, which is truly a blessing. But unexpectedly it adjusted my attitude of defeat into one of wanting to live again (I am 79). What I am getting at is this; it is all chemical, whether the powers that be realize it or not. Also, every symptom you have is most likely related to your other problems, so when one is relieved the others might benefit. You need a good open-minded doctor that looks at more than just the obvious manifestations of what is going on in your body systems but connects all the problems together to find the root cause or causes! Sorry for this lat post, I just joined this forum.