Such a big decision. Women make their choice for all sorts of reasons. My DIEP flap was almost 3 1/2 years ago now. While it was the only decision for me (for a number of reasons), I am still working through shoulder issues from the procedure. I had more pain in my shoulder than the surgical area (after the procedure), and still do today. My procedure was done at Mayo in Rochester, and I had a wonderful surgical team. It has been my experience (and my PT's) that Mayo is not, however, well as known for their rehab. This has been my experience in multiple (multiple) surgeries. Having said that, I asked if I could begin therapy at 8 weeks, and was told I could not - leaving my arms down for the duration of 12 weeks. Being a rule follower, I did not see my physical therapist until after 3 months. Fast forward to today - I am still having PT even 3+ years later. It's been a challenge, one that I continue to work though and manage. I have an Endless pool, so water therapy is grand for rehab, yet I have periods where I can't even swim a stroke due to the one shoulder. I'd like to say I simply adjust, but sometimes I get discouraged. Mostly, I am able to realize it is one thing out of many things that can happen, and I move on with life.

All of our choices are a trade-off. There are always going to be things we have to give up, adjust to, be happy about, or be disappointed with. And in some cases, we feel like we don't have much of a choice at all. In terms of a DIEP flap, I am glad that I can go to bed every night not wondering if my ducts are hiding new cancer cells (because those ducts left with the double mastectomy). And I'm glad that I don't have to think about my body reacting to implants (because I did not have any, except for the original expanders that were removed during the DIEP flap). And I'm glad that my rebuild was done with my own flesh. Though my breasts will never be what my original set was, I honestly forget they are not my original, for they have become my new normal. I'm thankful that time has caused me to feel this way . . . even with the scar tissue, even with the loss of sensation. It's really all ok. My hunch is, whatever you choose, in time you will be ok, too. It's more about how we look at things than what the physical result is. I'm just glad to be here, and having an opportunity to live life. My DIEP procedure gave me an opportunity to live that life with the appearance of my old normal, which helped me move on. 🙂