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@coping123

Quality of life is always in the forefront of my decisions. I try to indulge my husband’s desires while at the same time weigh safety & finances. My suggestion is that you rent an RV for a week or two & see how that goes. They aren’t cheap but it’s way less of an investment than buying one. There’s no way of knowing up front if it will be a positive experience. Dementias are strange beasts. One can still have dreams & goals but the reality of them could be a nightmare. I learned my lesson when I booked a 7-day trip to Florida (one of my husband’s bucket list items). Once airfare, hotel, and vehicle rental were confirmed & paid for he started obsessing on strangely minor details - such as getting from the airport to the hotel (just a couple of blocks). His anxiety continued to grow over the next few days. I ended up having to cancel the trip & forfeit $2,500+ in expenses. (I hadn’t felt the need for trip insurance.) Now I plan virtual trips & provide my husband with all the details of the plane, lodgings, maps of the area, etc. When his anxiety kicks in I “cancel” the trip. In the event the anxiety didn’t kick in (and it always does) I’d tell him trip was canceled due to XXX. I could use possibility of delayed flights, or concern about covid, etc. This way he still gets to dream & plan.

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Replies to "Quality of life is always in the forefront of my decisions. I try to indulge my..."

Thank you for answering me so fast and the great advice you gave me about renting a camper. It is the best way to go for so many reasons. However, now Will wants to sell our car and buy a self-contained van to drive. We will see how this goes. Not in a hurry to buy one so he will be happy for a while looking for what he thinks he wants.
Like you, I am cautious about making monetary decisions because he can change his mind at any time, getting upset at the smallest detail. He is on meds for anxiety that he has always had.
I want to mention something else here. When we socialize, Will has always been quiet, sitting on the sidelines. So no one pays attention to him and he is just a fixture. At our Christmas family dinner, my granddaughter’s fiancé actually pulled up a chair beside Will and struck up a conversation using photos of cars he had on his phone. I was so grateful to this young man for paying attention to Will and I am going to thank him personally. Since I am also guilty of not paying much attention to Will at social gatherings, this young man’s kind gesture made me realize that I also need to share my time at gatherings with Will. It isn’t a duty, it is just common courtesy to acknowledge the presence of someone else.
Until next time, Happy New Year!!

Brilliant!