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Cancer: Being diagnosed during the holiday season
Breast Cancer | Last Active: Jan 17 10:06am | Replies (26)Comment receiving replies
I got diagnosed two years ago today, dec 23. I was out of the country on a family trip for the holidays and found out by checking in my patient portal. I have PTSD from everything I’ve been through and the holidays are very triggery for me. The memories of that trip are not happy ones at all. I try to focus on the happy times of the season because I have kids but I think that sadness and fear will always be there. I know most cancer patients feel like that year round, but the holidays are definitely a vivid reminder.
Replies to "I got diagnosed two years ago today, dec 23. I was out of the country on..."
@cancerwifemom Oh, my. I'm so sorry to hear about how everything unfolded for you. Sometimes, those portal check-ins are not so helpful. (I learned to promise myself I would not check the portal on major things - even blood counts, for I found myself frightened to do so, or not understanding the results. . . so I made a promise to myself to stop looking, and wait for the doctor. And I did. :). ). I can only imagine finding out about your diagnosis that by reading it online. Of course, you would have trauma from learning about it that way, and it is easy to understand how the holidays would be a trigger for you. I pray that with time, it will lessen. Reentering life more fully helps, too, though I think it's normal to have everything rest in the recesses of your mind. Memories do that. Just give yourself time for some of that to fade, and continue to press on into the life you lead now with your children close by. Hugs.
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Cancerwifemom,
PTSD is a challenge to work through. We are processing the reality of life and death, the assault on our body, the changes in our body, our mind and our emotions. We face the reality that we are not in control of the trials we are given. We aren't in complete control of our bodies except what we put In it, How we Care for it and how we
Nourish it.
We also have our Mind to look after as well as our Emotions and Spirit.
Victory comes in stages. Look where you are now;
You’re 2 years out. That's a celebration!
And there will be more celebrations.
My diagnoses was 10 years ago, stage 3. It was just before Christmas. Treatment was January thru October.
The most important word I can share with you is CHOOSE Joy.
Cancer was not Our choice. But we DO have Our choice in How we are going to face it and work through it.
It may dominate our time, it will cause us to feel physically crappy, provoke depression, make us weak and overshadow us with fear.
BUT…. But that has a season and we can choose how to purpose it.
PTSD is a Process. It can be grueling and cruel. Anxiety is an enemy. What defeats Anxiety? PEACE.
How? GRATITUDE.
I was encouraged by a very dear friend to start a Blessing Book. I bought an 8x11 hardback spiral journal (Picadilly on Amazon) and was encouraged to write end of day, the Blessings I had received that day. At first it was just a paragraph or two. Then they got longer.
It could be a phone call I received, a smile with kind words from a stranger in a store, I might've been feeling good and got a few tasks done but I began to notice, the more blessings I had penned, the less power the PTSD had control over my life.
In time, those haunting reminders became a vapor.
Why? The Blessings overshadowed them.
And in time, for me, I recognized the Cancer itself BECAME a Blessing.
Each day has it blessings. Seek them to Victory.
PTSD will become an old and distant acquaintance because you will have chosen the Blessings.
A heart filled with gratitude leaves little room for lifes enemies.
March on. You've got a life to Live!