Good Morning, Merry,
I, too am spending my first Christmas without my sweet husband of 44 years. He passed away last month after suffering a stroke, and dealing with colon cancer all at the same time. It still doesn’t seem real at times. I know that he would want me to go on, and live life fully, but as you say, it is so very hard to be standing alone. Unfortunately we lost our son a year ago…..so we had both been dealing with that grief as well.

You asked what others will be doing for Christmas. I will be spending the weekend at a niece's, and visiting other family in that area, a few hours from my home. My daughter will be there also. Slowly we put one foot in front of the other, and try to make sense of our new worlds.
Wishing you some more warm feelings, and maybe a little bit of peace from time to time in the next few days.