in reply to @birdielox Well, I can sure remember when I was 15, and admittedly did quite a bit of acting because of a "situation" at home. I was fortunate to have a wonderful high school counselor who took me under her wing and offered me a great amount of guidance, that still helps me today. Does your school have any counselors you might be able to reach out to? Teenage years are downright awful, at least mine were. However, I was able to overcome many of the issues you describe as a result of talking to someone about them who had the skill set to help me. This is not to say that my behavior changed overnight, but she sure gave me a road map to follow, and it was quite helpful.
I am so sorry that you identify yourself as a "bad" person. Can you try reframing your sense of self? No one is perfect, and we have no control over anyone among us, even if we try to control them. Look at yourself. You were strong enough to reach out, and this is very telling in itself. Maybe a trip to your doctor would be helpful to find out if medication is something that would help you, but I highly encourage you to find a counselor so that you can freely express yourself and grow through this experience. Teenage years are the most formidable, in my opinion. But guess what, there is hope and you have your whole life ahead of you. Go for it! There are a lot of exciting things going on in our world for young people such as yourself. Afterall, you are the future generation and the opportunities for those like you are endless.