A tumor board is typically consulted in very difficult cases. You can ask what specialties are on the tumor board and ask for a copy of the tumor board report if this is possible. It will give some perspective on what is going on. The therapist, spiritual care that I have personally have helped me a lot as well as family and friends. Palliative care tries to address issues related to improving quality of life. Typically your doctor should refer you but consultation with a counselor/therapist who works in oncology might understand your issues. Mine happened to have his wife died from pancreatic cancer. I saw him before my diagnosis. He disclosed this after my diagnosis. I asked if he would be comfortable with continuing seeing me and he was. I find that he really "gets it". So does my minister who previously worked as a Chaplin in palliative care and hospice. Thanks for sharing your story, you have traveled a difficult road for sure.