shardin10, I can't imagine that kind of pain. I am so sorry. Are you near a church that had meetings called "Grief Share"? They are phenomenal if you think the timing is right for you to attend a group like this. People talk out their hurt, loneliness, anger, etc., I am praying for you right now and again I am so sorry that you are hurting. Blessings.....

I'm sorry but your not allowed! jk
Being one who was estranged from my family I feel I can make light of it. My Family totally estranged me after my mother died. Not only did I have the grief of losing my Mom but then the rest of my family (all my sisters. My father died when I was almost 3 and my little brother died 3 years before my mother.) They had already split up the estate amongst themselves before my mother died. So it was really greed that motivated them. I left a trail of tears across the state of Nebraska while coming back to Colorado. It gets better and I have came to realize that it was their own insecurity that led them to commit this act.