I took care of my mom after she was diagnosed with dementia. She lived with me for about three years and then needed more help so moved to an assisted living. She was there for about 18 months and her decline required a memory care facility. She eventually went on hospice care at the memory care facility. The best thing the hospice nurse told me was that I needed to go places and do things on my own. She pointed out to me that my mom didn’t know whether I’ve been gone for five minutes or for five days. probably have been the case for a very long time, but I felt compelled to always be there for her. It took a huge toll on me. After the nurse told me that my husband and I took a two week vacation, I was assured hospice nurses contact me if necessary, and that I should focus on a well deserved respite. In hindsight, I wish I had been able to do this sooner rather than later. It is really really hard.