If there’s room on that comfy chair, I’ll sit. ☺️. A little wine 🍷 while we whine. Thanks for sharing 🫰🏼

@ray666 Thanks for your response. As I read it, I was reminded of that song from "The Showman" - "This is me!" I have been retired for 9 years now... and do not miss the paperwork. I was in helping professions all my life, and I do miss the interaction with people... but the paperwork had become too time consuming. I'm sorry that you had to give up your beloved acting career, as it obviously brought you a lot of enjoyment. I can't say, either, that I have a lot of "pain" with my PN. I do have pins and needles, tingling, and numbness in my feet and slightly into my ankles at times. On occasion, I may get the burning sensation in my toes. But for the most part, my feet feel numb and tingly, which is strange.... and I have some issues with gait and balance at times...but not a lot of actual pain. If I'm walking full speed in a pretty straight path, such as for exercise, I tend to wobble less. I have more problem maneuvering from room to room in my home.... or in stores with aisles and stands to travel around. I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis in Nov 2021. I saw several neurologists and several orthopedists before deciding on one. The spine specialist I chose sent me for PT, and when that didn't do the trick after several months, he sent me to a pain specialist for epidural injections in my spine and also in my sacrum. By Nov 2022, the pain in my hips and legs was so bad I could walk only about 30 yards before sitting. I had a four-level laminectomy in Nov 2022 and two months later resumed PT. After a few months of the PT, I seemed to still be having problems with balance, so the spine doc sent me for an MRI of my neck, and he found that I had a disc at C-4 that was pushing against my spinal cord. No pain, but it obviously didn't need to be left to get worse... so I underwent a cervical fusion in May. After 6 weeks, I resumed PT.... and I could tell immediately that the cervical surgery did help. But the balance was still off a bit, and the conclusion is that it was related to the year of compression of my spinal cord from the stenosis. Here I am almost 2 years later .... able to walk again, but needing a break more often than before... and also my calf muscles seem to tire more easily. Could it be from sitting on my keester too much during the lockdown? I'll never know. I try to walk everyday. During the summer I swam. And I do go to the gym on occasion. I've read and researched, and I had my PCP check my Vitamin B-12 and B6, both of which are fine. I've bought "recovery shoes" in several brands. Some help more than others. I've gone the Gabapentin and Lyrica routes.... neither one doing anything for me other than making me feel loopy. I now take a low dose of Amitriptyline, but I can't say it helps very much. I have taken Benfotiamine and R Alpha Lipoic Acid ever since not long after my surgery last November... and it's about time I chunked those, too, to see if I notice any change. I have a foot massager that I slip my feet into several times a week, and that helps a bit. But I'm gradually coming to the realization that, like you, this is something that is a part of me now and I will just have to live with it. You said "the psychological hurt was punishing," and I guess that's where I am now. At 72, I suppose I should be grateful to still be mobile. albeit with limitations. Bette Davis had it right when she said "old age is not for sissies." This old body is beginning to show signs of wear and tear... and most everyone goes through aches and pains with aging. But I refuse to mentally "grow old" any sooner than I absolutely have to. 🙂

Yep Ray, its all about moving forward. I've had to give up my identity as an athlete. Just as hard as you giving up the stage. Its taken me some time, but I have found creative outlets that take my mind off of my painful body, thank goodness. The word 'acceptance' is too passive. I believe a person has to actively seek new passions, a new way of living. Only then can we find satisfaction. For me, the key is looking forward, not backward. Thanks to everyone for their posts. Tis fascinating to hear how everyone else approaches these debilitating changes. min