Popcovas, read, research, ask questions of anyone who has experience. Then, consider the particulars of your relative's specific situation - age, activity, health outside of the PCa, expected life expectancy. He should, of course, also consider the thoughts of a spouse or significant other because it affects not just us. The answer to the question you pose will be different for all who are faced with similar options.

My own situation is a diagnosis at age 65. I'm otherwise healthy, active, and expect at least a couple of decades more. All indications for me pointed to PCa being contained to my prostate. I chose to get it out. My surgeon has performed about 1,000 of these surgeries and followed all the items on my checklist (robotic assist, nerve sparing, and laparoscopic).

The post-op pathology report showed all sampled lymph nodes and seminal vesicles were clean and the margins were clear. All indications are that my 3+4 was contained within my prostate when it was removed 3 weeks ago. I feel good about my decision. I was really worried about incontinence and ED. My surgeon tried to reassure me but I was still concerned. The nerve sparing seems to have, thankfully, worked on both issues.

One book that helped me make my decision was Dr. Patrick Walsh's Guide to Surviving Prostate Cancer. Another book that help me prepare for continence was Vanita Gaglani's Life After Prostatectomy.

Regardless of what he decides, as my friend Michael on this site encouraged me, know he's done the work to make a choice and he's considered all the things he can. Now, stop worrying and be positive about the future. He'll have made the right choice for him.

Godspeed!