Here's my clinical history...

When I met with my surgeon to go over the pathology report from my surgery he said, "Kevin, this is an excellent pathology report, T2CNoMx, margins, ECE, SV negative, 10% involvement and GS downgraded from 4+5 to 4+4...and combined with my surgery observations, you should not have any problems in the future."

Hmm, I looked at the Mx and thought, I don't like that they don't know if there is any metastasized disease. Keep in mind the state of imaging in 2014, MRT and CT.

I knew based on MSKCC nomogram with that clinical data, especially the GS, statistically I had a 30% chance of BCR. Wouldn't you know, 15 months later he looks at his computer screen to see my PSA results and hesitates before turning to me...yep, pity party #2 began.

I won't say that with each recurrence, I haven't had my pity party, albeit briefly. Then, I pick myself up off the floor and deal with it.

Almost 9-1/2 years later...nine holidays with my family, vacations aplenty, daughters graduating from college and going out in their worlds and being successful, many bike rides, pickleball and skiing with friends...you get the idea. ALong the way, I have fired various members of my medical team who failed to match my outcomes, long life and who recommended only the SOC.

So, you are entitled to your pity party but briefly. If your furfure holds treatment, so be it. I expect at 57, you have a lot of living to do. There is the possibility of a "cure" with initial BCR, if not, your advanced PCa may be a chronic disease that you live with and manage.

Kevin